Serrated Blade
by a mountain of gideon's scones
Summary: He's cheating on her. She can't believe it. She does something that causes someone else's heart to break. Can she come back? Or is she lost... Forever? Will she do things she regrets? Contains suicide. Shane/Claire/Michael. Entirely original. Please r&r!
1. Life Changing Discoveries

**Chapter 1:**

**After pleading from MarshmallowStarfish (she asked me to write it) I decided to start this fic, now! So enjoy!**

**I hope you're proud of me, guys... I WROTE A STORY WITH A SHORT TITLE! That's a first, right? Anyway, read it!**

**Also, I KNOW Claire's bracelet got to go poof in the books, but this is my fic so it remains. There'll be reason for it later... Trust me!**

**I don't own anything**

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_Claire's POV:_

Life is utter bliss. I mean, Shane and I are happy, we're closer than ever, and then the rest of life seems pretty damned great. Eve and Michael are _really _happy, with the amount of arguing depleting every day (most arguments are about his vampiric status... But she seems to be accepting that) and the fact that no vampires have sworn revenge on Amelie (therefore Morganville) or any psychotic machines thinking that I'm in love with my crazy, fluffy bunny slippers with fangs, boss have been around for _at least _three months, it's pretty damned chilled! By comparison, the blip with the whole 'memory loss' thing seemed a little passé, menial almost. Maybe the reason that Michael and Eve haven't really argued is because they haven't been speaking... It's just occurred to me that the house has been devoid of any interaction (or Michael and Shane really - besides at dinnertime when I'm there) between them whatsoever, arguing or not. Still, I'm sure they'll work it out: I bet simply they argued and Shane took Eve's side so his interaction will have fuelled an even _bigger _vampires-are-evil attack... Probably when I was in class. Why do I _always _miss the good (well not good but you know what I mean) fights but manage to be present for the life threatening/blood draining ones with V.I.P backstage passes ones? Sooo not fair... Still, I'm sure it'll clear up: but maybe that's where Shane got that brusie on his jaw from last week and not by walking into a cupboard like he said.

Dare I say that life with no problems is rather, well... _Boring_? I bet I've just jinxed myself now, saying that; something is bound to happen soon - I mean whenever you say something that has potential implications (and none of them would be good ones) it _always _holds true. Always. Whether you're talking about your simple life or that you need it to be dry so that you can have a picnic, something happens to throw a curveball in life!

**CB, you home yet? **

I get this text from Michael (recieved on my geriatic phone which has _seriously _seen better days: I demand better luxuries for being 'Amelie's pet' and her Protectee, including new phones when the old one breaks _doing missions for her_!) and smile slightly at the whole 'big-bro' thing going on. No matter that he's a vampire - he's my best guy friend (that's not including my boyfriend) and he really cares for me. So what if he sucks a bit of plasma? There are some, as much as it pains me to admit, really good vampires out there: Sam instantly springs to mind and I guess Amelie definitely fits in there (the amount of times she's saved me when she hasn't had to is pretty remarkable) and also Myrnin (purely for his scientific knowledge - he's sometimes the one that _causes _me to need rescuing!)... Some of the undead aren't so bad. Of course Bishop, Ysandre, Pennywell and Oliver spring to mind to volatilely defend the vampire's reputation as the big baddies, but there are bad humans, so why not bad vampires?

**No, I'm walking home at the minute... Be there soon! Claire x**

I send this quickly before scurrying on; even in daylight hours, never linger in Morganville. If you stand in the shadows especially, you never know how old the vamps loitering are, so unless you want to play 'play your cards right' with your life, don't stay still for long.

I'm heading home early today - earlier than I told Shane - to surprise him. Well, _really_ it's because my lecture was cancelled but I can always lie and pretend that it was because I just wanted to see him! May as well bolster his ego - something I haven't done in a little while!

I reach the Glass House and open the wrought iron gate to allow me entrance to my home. I smile as I walk up the stairs into the wide verandha area, shaded from the forcefully intense UV rays of the midday sun. I take a deep breath of pollen infested air (from the overgrown garden out front that Neighbourhood Garden Patrol - Eve calls them Morganville Nazis - continually harass us about) as my phone beeps. However, I ignore it: I'm about to walk in the door and I doubt that whatever Michael has to say is going to be different to what Shane or Eve could tell me.

I push open the thick wooden door and smile as the smell of my baby's chilli wafts into my face. Then the smile hardens on my face as I spot an abnormality in the living room. Clothes, discarded clothes, littering the floor as if they'd been removed in a great hurry. Maybe it's Michael and Eve's clothing and _that's _why he texted; but why would he stop, you know, to do that?

And anyway, that's Shane's top. He was wearing it this morning: turquoise with ragged edges and sleeves half hanging off. Now, unless he's arranged a striptease for me, he's got a girl up there. He's cheating on me. I come home early to find my boyfriend doing it with another girl.

I pick up my phone in my sweaty hand and take it with me, a weapon at the ready. I don't bother to read the message as it can't be important - not compared to this. I sneak up the stairs, noticing how Shane's clothing is littering the wooden stairs, mingled with girl's clothing. He's definitely got someone in here. I see rathe revealing clothing on behalf of the skank, including a bra which looks mighty familiar... I don't know why though.

Ignoring the possible fashion similarities I may have with the whore, I creep upstairs, ready to catch him in the act. Tears drip silently down my face as my hand reaches for the slippery doorknob. I hear noises that are all too familiar; a girl yelling and Shane's grunting and other noises that make me want to throw things now he's using them with some other girl.

With the sweat on my hand, it takes three goes to turn the door and let it silently open. However, when the door finishes opening, it crashes into the wall, causing Shane to jump. I notice his naked form, the way that he's protecting the identity of his whore by covering her face, as he turns to face me. His face is rapidly turning from flushed and happy to bone white, more anxious than ever before.

"Claire... This isn't what it looks like!" he protests but I don't react. I cannot move; I'm paralysed, rooted to the spot by which I currently stand... He's really cheating on me. He's with another girl in the bed we shared, fucking. Great.

"Really?" I manage to say, my voice full of bitterness. "As, to me, Shane it looks like you're sleeping with another girl and you've just been busted by the person you supposedly love," I continue and watch as his facial expression turns to guilt.

"Please, let me explain," he begs, but I shake my head. I take a step forwards as my body relinquishes it's stance by the doorway, and watch as he looks horrified. "Let me come and explain downstairs. Please, Claire..."

I shake my head again and stride forwards.

"Come on, let me see what girl you apparently feel is so much better than me," I spit out at him, hoping to send each word as a dagger into that girl's heart, then into his. It's what he deserves. I move closer and closer and wrench his head out of the way to look into the eyes I know so well.

The phone in my hand slips out in shock as my eyes shut, my head spinning around and around. This cannot be true. This. Cannot. Be. True. Please. You have GOT to be kidding me!

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**So, what did you think to the beginning of my first multi-chaptered Shane/Claire fic?**

**Who d'u think the girl is?**

**Should I continue? Review & tell me... Or just review! review and you'll persuade me to write the next chapter faster!**

**Vicky xx**


	2. I Want You Gone

**Chapter 2: **

**So, here's a new chapter... 8 reviews was frickin' awesome, more please :P**

**Let's find out who Shane is cheating with!**

**I don't own anything!**

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_Claire's POV:_

Eve Rosser. My boyfriend is cheating on me with my best friend. Well, I really didn't see _this _one coming!

I take a deep breath as I remove the look of shock on my face, replacing it simply with anger. How dare they do this to me! How dare they do it to Michael!

"Why hello... I could have sworn that you were my friend, or has that been a lie so you could screw my boyfriend without me knowing?" I hiss at Eve, who moves away from me slightly. She cowers into the corner of the bed, clutching at the sheets. That ought to infuriate me but it doesn't. I simply take a deep breath and regain as much composure as possible; I will _not _let them see that they've hurt me.

With as much composure as I can manage, I bend down to pick my phone up in a cool and dignified manner. Shane stands up and tries to come over to me but I shrug out of the way of his arms, sickened by him being at all close to me. All sense of trying to be relaxed gone, I run out of the room, slamming the door behind me.

Now I'm out of their eyesight, I let the tears flow down my face, blinding me. I throw my fist into my mouth to hide the sound of my sobbing until I'm in the safe haven of my room. Here, I slam the door shut and lock it before sliding down the slippery wood to come to rest on the floor. I wail out and place my head on my knees, wrapping my arms around it to try and comfort myself.

_He cheated on me. He really did it. He slept with someone else... More than that. He slept with my __**best friend**_**, **_his best friend's girlfriend._

Oh my god. That might be why they haven't been talking; maybe Michael knows. Maybe he knew that they were together and wanted to protect me from knowing. But why would he stay with her, if he knew she was cheating? Why would he let them stay in this house, pretending to me that everything is normal? I'm seventeen, nearly eighteen, years old; I'm not a child. They don't have to protect me.

With shaking hands, I move one arm to search for the phone on the floor of my room. I find it and note the flashing of it - the message from Michael.

**Claire, DON'T GO HOME! I'll explain later, just come to Common Grounds or something! M xx**

Oh god, he definitely knew. He tried to stop me coming home, to stop me facing this heartbreak. I wish I'd listened. I wish I'd have read his text, it could have saved me so much pain. However, I have to say that I'd have gone home anyway. Someone telling me to not do something just makes me want to do it more... But he knows! He knows that his girlfriend has been cheating on him with _my _boyfriend. That is wrong.

But why? Why? Why would Shane feel the need to cheat on me with Eve? Am I not good enough for him, or something? Is my love not enough, not worthy enough, for him? Am _I _nothing? I don't get why he would want to cheat on me; I thought that we were in love. I thought our relationship was working out, that we were in it for the long haul. Evidently we weren't.

Screaming voices interrupt my self reflection on why Shane would want to cheat on me. At first I simply listen to the noises, unable to distinguish the words or even the identity of the person, but then I get too intrigued. What are they arguing about? On second thoughts, I know what they're arguing about... I think. But I want to hear the conversation, to see if Shane or Eve try to justify their actions to Michael. Even though they probably already had this argument when he found them. Is _that _why the table was smashed 8 days ago; he got so mad that he used only a fraction of his strength and destroyed it.

Tiptoeing like a child who is creeping out of their bedroom when they hear their parents discussing christmas presents, I unlock the door and pull it open. Here, the voices are much louder and I can distinguish every word they are saying.

"-tell her for?" Shane's angry voice spits out and I see, as I creep closer to the staircase, that he is looking at Michael.

"I didn't!" he yells back, his face flushed slightly with anger. His eyes flicker up to where I'm standing but then look away without either of the cheating scumbags notice. He smiles a half smile and I know it's directed at me. Even though he's no longer looking, I smile back, a touch of something good at my heart for the first time today! "I knew you'd be at it, the disgusting creatures you are, so I simply told her not to go home. Unfortunately, it seems she didn't get the text!"

it sounds as if someone whispers something to Michael and he _definitely _responds, looking slight sheepish but still defiant, but I can't tell what he says. It's too quiet. However, everything about this short exchange is forgotten when Eve moves into the picture.

"Michael... Please," Eve begs, sounding as if she's begging him. I notice how she moves closer to him and reaches out, but he moves away, disgusted. Her robe falls open slightly and she hastily rewraps it around her, moving back towards Shane. This sickens me. It's not enough that they were sleeping together, now they want to _be _together?

"Don't you dare speak to me," he hisses at her, for the first time appearing like a vampire. "What about Claire? Did she deserve to come home and find this? No matter how much it sickened me, I kept things together until you two would man up and tell her yourselves... But you didn't manage that. Instead she found you together... You sicken me," he continues, disgust evident in his voice.

"You're a vampire... You don't deserve to be sickened," Shane snarls and I instantly feel as if I want to go down to him and slap him across the face for speaking to Michael like that.

"That's it!" Michael erupts, making me jump with his sudden increase in volume. "You're out! I let you stay before so that you could continue your charade but that's over. You saw the end to that. So go and pack your bags!  
I want you gone before sunset," he continues before stalking away.

I hear sounds of protest but the individual words go over my head. The reality of the situation hits me; Shane really did cheat on me. He cheated with my best friend.

The tears continue to fall silently down my cheeks as I push the door to my bedroom open slowly, all the energy gone from me. I want to wail and scream and protest but I can't. I don't have the energy or the will or anything to do it... I just want a hug.

I move forwards onto the bed and curl up, the tears clouding my vision. I don't hear anything but suddenly Michael is in my room and holding me close, the shutting door the only symbol that he hasn't been here the entire time.

"Why?" I whisper into his shoulder, of which his golden blonde hair just reaches... He needs a haircut! "Why did they do it, Michael?"

"I don't know, honey, I really don't know," he replies slowly and I can tell that he's barely keeping the tears in himself. My arms wrap around his back and he places his head on my shoulder. I hear the tears falling out of his eyes in the sudden silence and he seems entirely human. If I didn't know, I'd have definitely said he was human; the emotion he is feeling cannot be made up.

"Will we be alright, Michael?" I ask him quietly, once this bout of tears has faded.

He doesn't reply straight away; instead, we listen as the defeated clumping of the cheaters walk past my room to their own rooms to gather their stuff. Where they will go, I don't care. Who cares it's nearly sunset in a town overran with vampires; they deserve everything that they get.

Finally he responds. With one hand he plays with a little strand of my hair as he speaks: "You know what, Claire? I think we will, we really will. We deserve it," he half smiles and I reciprocate it. Even though I don't see how we can be ok... Really, I hope we will but... The likelihood doesn't seem to be that at the moment.

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**What did you think?**

**Sorry it's a little short/boring/not much happening in it, in my maths exam today I spent AGES working on Devil's Lair ideas but a few minutes on this & I've planned out quite a bit!**

**Lots of reviews last chappy... Please, everyone review! Love you if you do! I'll update faster as well!**

**Vicky xx**


	3. I Need To Speak To You

**Chapter 3:**

**I update faster when I get more reviews… hehe lol, so here is chapter 3!**

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_Claire's POV:_

So Michael is too soft. I suppose he had already lived with the knowledge for about a week, but allowing them to stay in this house until they find someplace else to live is going _too_ far.

They aren't to eat with us, spend time in the communal areas and are not to speak to either Michael or I. However, that doesn't stop them giving me looks every time they walk past me, sympathetic looks to try and make me forgive them. That isn't going to happen. They both betrayed me and Michael and whilst he may be willing to forgive them, I can't. They cheated on us, they destroyed my trust in them instantly in that moment I caught them together and they have _no_ right to try and make me forgive them.

Yet that doesn't mean that I don't miss them. This is what I do, every day. Every morning, I wake up and want to feel Shane sleeping next to me, to know that I can roll over and give him a kiss… I miss that. I miss Eve serving me in Common Grounds (she quit to go back to the UC as she didn't want me to have to see her every time I went into the coffee shop… something which I do appreciate) and the way that we could chatter about Shane and Michael. however, whenever I think of this, I remember that she was screwing my boyfriend when I was talking to her about him, so she probably only wanted more information on him.

So both of them have been staying out of the way, which has only made me feel more desolate. Michael has tried, god he has tried, to make me feel normal and happy but it didn't particularly work. I feel alone and empty and as if nobody loves me. The two people who professed that they did cheated with each other, so that doesn't really work, does it?

It's strange, what I am contemplating. When you don't get any sleep for three nights solid, because all you can think about is the naked form of your boyfriend on top of your best friend, you begin to envision so many different things. You contemplate suicide, just to get away from it and manage to rest, you contemplate burning every single article of their clothing… you even consider creeping into their rooms at night and covering them in paint just for the hell of it! However, I cannot be bothered to do at least the latter two of those… suicide seems the easy option. I am just so _tired_ and lonely and feel as if there is nothing in the world for me. I don't want to feel like this. I want to be happy with someone; Michael doesn't seem to get this. He seems pretty happy, well as much as he can be with them being in the house, and I don't get why this is. He just seems calm and normal and I wish that he would react like I am, just to make me feel more normal.

I know I am reacting as every other girl in my situation will react, no matter if they are in Morganville or not. This is the same problem that millions of poor and unfortunate girls face when they find their boyfriends cheating on them… unfortunately, with their best friend. If I am overreacting, then they are as well…

"Claire, what are you doing?" Michael's voice comes from the back of the kitchen. I jump, turning away with a guilty expression from the ogling of the fridge I was doing… I was thinking and just staring into space. I look down into my hands and realise that I am holding a knife _rather_ too close to my wrist for my own liking.

"Nothing… I was just thinking and then I forgot I was holding it," I explain, placing the offensive weapon on the work surface so that he relaxes. Michael turns to look at me with an admonishing expression, which changes to concern and then something else (something I can't read) before he hastily looks away.

"You want pancakes for breakfast?" he asks me and I nod; I may as well have something if he is cooking because I _really_ can't be bothered to start cooking. I'd probably space out again and then the Glass House would burn down and then _nobody_would have a place to live. That would _really_ not be great – even worse than things are now.

Sure thing," I confirm that I want them, when I realise that he can't see that I nodded my head.

"I know, Claire," he says, confusing me. He turns around with a small smile and points to his ears. "I heard the movement of air that meant that you were nodding!"

"Yes, because you _really_ need to show off your vampire status," Shane's voice drawls in the doorway, making my back instantly stiffen. Michael turns from laughing and friendly to cold and hard in less than a second… If looks could kill, Shane would be dead ten times over.

"I thought I said to you, don't talk to us," he says quietly, an undertone of menace in his voice.

"I need to talk to Claire," Shane says, with something in his voice that I can't identify… what is _with_ me and not being able to recognise things today? Then again, no sleep will probably do that to you.

"No, she doesn't want to," Michael answers for me, but something (the part of me that loves Shane, no matter what he has done) inside of me disagrees.

"Ok," I surprise myself by saying, turning and facing the person in question.

"Claire…" Michael says, warningly. I hear him continuing to make the pancakes, and turn back to smile in reassurance.

"Michael, I'll be fine. You can hear if anything is wrong and everything… call me when breakfast is ready, alright?" I confirm. I can feel the smile fading off my face as I trudge out of the kitchen after Shane, Michael's eyes on me the entire way. I don't know if I should do this... but I am. So let's go see what Shane has to say. But I won't fall for it... I _won't_!

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**So, what did you think?**

**I'm sorry, not much happens but what happens next chapter will be good – I think!**

**Please review so you get the update sooner! You know you want to!**

**Vicky xxx**


	4. What Is It?

**Chapter 4:**

**So, I left a TEENSY cliffhanger last chapter, but nothing that you can't survive without knowing :P**

**I don't own anything!**

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_Claire's POV:_

I follow Shane out of the kitchen and up the stairs. My heart pounding, I expect him to head for his room but he doesn't - that would be too insensitive and not exactly help his quest to 'get me back' by showing me the room where he continually banged my best friend.

"I'm not going up there with you," I say, my voice cold and as hard as ice. That could also deem it to be brittle - something which it is... My voice, like ice, is at dynamic equilibrium, able to be changed back and forth at will... Or in my case, dependant on what is said.

He's pointing for me to enter the secret room, the room where we spent so many nights together as a happy couple, but I refuse. I cannot have this discussion in there, the place that was so poignant in our memories together.

"Why not?" he asks, confused. I shake my head, disgusted that he doesn't even remember theses things (did I mean _that_ little to him?), and walk back down the stairs, motioning for him to follow me. I hear him clumping down behind me and my heart rate increases dramatically – I want to turn around and kiss him! But at the same time, I want to turn around and slap him so damned hard that his brain suffers an aneurysm.

I walk into the living room and turn the corner so that we are as far away from the kitchen as possible. Michael will still be able to hear, but I hope that he only listens to see if I am in trouble, not for any specifics of the conversation.

"What do you want?" I ask him, my voice inflicting no emotion whatsoever. I want this conversation over with as soon as possible, so that I can go back to being normal (as possible) with Michael and he can get back to going and looking for a flat for him and his whore.

"Claire… I am so sorry, I didn't mean for any of this to happen or anything," he says, trying to look me in the eye. I don't think that I can protect my mind and my heart if I look at him, so I simply look at the floor… not that he has the _right_ to look at me! He doesn't have the right to be so confident and self assured – he should be grovelling and looking at the floor, not _daring_ to look me in the eye… or try to, at least.

"You didn't mean to sleep with my best friend, on obviously more than one occasion?" I clarify, my voice cold now. "So you both managed to fall over, land on top of her, your clothes falling off in the process without any meaning involved. You both managed to end up with your tongues down each other's throats and be disgusting together _without_ meaning to? Of course you didn't, Shane, so just man up and admit it."

"I'm sorry…" he says, not denying that _anything_ that I have said. "Truly, Claire, I am. I didn't mean…"

"You mean, you didn't mean to get _caught_ with Eve, did you?" I finish his sentence for him, pre-empting everything that he is going to say.

I look at him, his eyes finally looking at the floor, and his shoulders have sagged entirely. I got exactly what he was going to say – of course, he would have said in a much more elaborate way, to try and confuse me. I guess that he has forgotten that _I_ am the child (well I was a child) genius and I can decipher a load of waffle to get the true meaning of anything… I guess that that is why I am so damned good at physics.

"I… Claire… please, if you'll just forgive me, I swear we can work everything out," he begs. That is why he wanted to talk to me, he just expects me to forgive him instantly. It has been three days. That is all, three days since I caught him and Eve together and he expects everything to be doolalley between us already. God his is bloody mental!

"Let me get this straight," I say, my voice sounding as if a lemon exploded all over it, it is that bitter. Amelie should be proud of this… "You were having sex with my best friend _in our bed_ three days ago, and you expect me to have forgiven you and want to jump into the same bed with _you_ now? Man, you are more retarded than I thought!"

His face drops even further with these words before he looks up sharply. He moves towards me, using his power and strength to move over before I realise, and his hand grabs my arm. His fingers dig in slightly, crushing my skin together.

"Ow, Shane, you're hurting me," I mumble, quieter so that Michael doesn't hear. However, Shane's fingers get tighter on my arm and I wince in pain.

"Claire… we can get everything sorted out again, if you'll just forgive me," he whispers into my ear but I shake my head. His hand tightens even _more_ and I gasp out in agony.

"Shane, get _off_ me!" I cry out in agony. Instantly, Michael is through to us and throwing Shane off me. He holds him in one hand, a menacing expression on his face.

"I'm pretty sure she told you to get off her the first time, so unless the meaning of the words have changed between the first and the second time, stay the hell away from her," he snarls into Shane's ear. Damn, I guess that Michael heard the first time around.

"Get off me, you blood sucking bastard," Shane snarls in Michael's direction, wrenching himself out of his grip. Michael obviously released him, but then he turns around and throws the cheating bastard onto the sofa. Shane looks at how Michael comes over to me and gives me a quick hug, his eyes lighting up.

"This is why you won't forgive me," he snarls again, but this time at both Michael and me. "You're planning on banging that bloodsucker. God, you're a fangbanger, bloody hell you're a psycho, Claire."

"That's it," Michael yells, moving over to grab Shane by the collar.

I can't believe this. I cannot believe that he has accused me of flirting, of being in a relationship, with Michael. Michael, the other person who had just been cheated on, is apparently my new boyfriend, the one that I am 'banging'. Yeah, right! Just because he cheated on me, doesn't mean that I am going to do this!

In a daze, I run out of the room and into the kitchen. Michael and Shane yell at each other but I block out the words, hoping that I don't have to hear anything of the sort again. As I pass the mirror, I see that my face has drained to bone white, being less colourful than a vampire's.

In the kitchen, I turn off the stove with the pancakes on, so that the house doesn't go up in flames. Frantically, I wipe away the tears flowing down my face as I search through the cupboards for the things that I need, as well as finding the necessary other item on the counter.

I sneak past the arguing pair of boys, noticing how Michael isn't using any strength whatsoever so that it is a fair fight, and slip up the stairs to my room. I can do this… can't I?

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**So, what did you think of the Shane/Claire talk?**

**What is she going to do?**

**Please review! If you do, you get the next chapter **_**much**_** sooner, and finding out what happens! If everyone reviewed, or even 10%, that would be about 15 reviews (as about 170 odd people have read just the last **_**chapter**_**) so PLEASE REVIEW!**

**Aussi, j'ai un exam francais parlant aujourd'hui donc I updated for you, so review and make my sacrifice to French worth it!**

**Vicky xx**


	5. Sleep Is A Respite

**Chapter 5:**

**Nice cliffie there for you… now enjoy the aftermath of it!**

**AM I CRAZY? I only updated 2 days ago now and I am updating again... probs because I may not update for a while because I have another 7 stories to update and NEXT TUESDAY I AM GOING TO IRELAND! Whoop... so enjoy the chapter!**

***events in this chapter may be slightly traumatic and such, so please bear that in mind when you read***

**Sorry for you amazing people who have already read this chapter - I made some edits to my grammar and stuff (that's what you get for writing at like 1am) so I reposted the chapter! **

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_Claire's POV:_

I cannot survive in this house anymore… but it's more than that. I cannot survive in this _life_ anymore… I don't want to have to feel the pain that Shane and Eve caused when they cheated on me and Michael. I don't want to have to not sleep at night, just to feel even worse in the morning. I don't want to have to face him and have him insinuate things about me that are _completely_ untrue – I just want this suffering to be over. I don't want to have to think about having to face Shane anymore in this house.

I want to die.

In my hand, I hold a bottle of the sleeping pills I got from way back when Dean nearly killed me – they were for the pain and apparently _extremely_ strong… if I take enough of them; it should begin to slow my heartbeat for me to then finish the job.

With shaking hands, I open the bottle of large white pills and tip them onto the bed. In my other hand, I hold the glass filled quickly with water from the bathroom, the impurities visible in the dim light even… but I don't care. This isn't something that needs to be perfect – it is ending my life… it doesn't need to be fricking brilliant.

Do I _really_ want to do this? Do I want to cut my life short so prematurely, when some people don't have the choice when they die? Look at Sam… he died for this town. He died so that we could survive – but he didn't choose to go at that time. It's only luck and various other things that I cannot explain that has meant he has been able to return to the land of the living… so maybe he isn't the best example.

Look at all those in the world that have to live through so much suffering that means that they have to end their own lives, just to end the pain. I feel as if I belong in this category – that my life is so unliveable that I just physically _can't_ do it anymore. I don't feel as if I _want_ to struggle on through life, never knowing whether or not something is the right thing to do… if it is over, I can lose that.

I nod my head, knowing that this is exactly what I want to do.

My mind made up, I pick up the pills from the bed – about fifteen – and cram them all into my mouth, downing them with water… I don't feel any different at the minute but I know soon that I will become drowsy.

However, I cannot rely on that. I could be found and rescued before I die and that isn't something that I want to do. I don't want to have to live with the fact that my bid to end my life was unsuccessful. I don't want to have to live with the knowledge that everyone knew I tried to commit suicide but failed, as I do in everything... Shane proved that one.

That's why I brought the serrated blade up with me from the kitchen, the one that I had hovering over my wrist earlier. I only contemplated suicide before... Now it seems the only way - the sleeping pills I've taken counteract any rationale in my head saying stop... I've already started. I'm going to die soon.

And I want to.

I lower myself onto my bed, shaking horribly as the knowledge my life will end momentarily hits me. I didn't say goodbye to my parents or... Bloody hell, Myrnin's gonna want to kill me for leaving him in the lurch in the lab. I didn't say goodbye to anything I love - but now it's too late.

As I begin to feel the effects of the sleeping pills take hold on me, I realise that the bracelet on my wrist is glowing... But that doesn't bother me. Amelie, or whoever she sends to find me, will only do so when they are too late - she isn't going to be bothered for a human's life, is she?

My hands trembling, I lower the knife over my left wrist, the end of the blade pointing towards the door. Taking a huge breath, I slowly lower the knife... Until it hits my skin.

I pull the knife through the sinews and soft flesh, wincing slightly as the pain processes its way to my brain. Blood begins to pour out but it doesn't look strange or wrong - it's as if I _should _be doing this! Through the pain, I manage to move the knife over to the other wrist and replicate the injury before the action becomes too much for my drug addled and now heavily bleeding body.

The serrated blade falls to the floor with a clatter, sending blood drops flying as it does. My arms fall over the edge of the bed and I feel the droplets of blood forming on my hand as they make their way out of my spurting artery.

Weakness covers my entire body and now I know I can't even cry out because I don't have the energy. Death hovers just around the corner from me and I wait anxiously for it to greet me... Finally.

My eyes drift shut of their own accord and I soon loose all senses...

Drifting off, I die, leaving behind a world of misery for hopefully something better, if nothing at all...

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**Sorry, the chapter is short! But still - whatcha think of the events?**

**Please review... There's at least one more chapter :P so hurry up and review! Even if only to tell me that the story is good... or just your opinion! When I reach 50 reviews I shall update!**

**Vicky xx**


	6. Issues With Blood

**Chapter 6: **

**Sorry for the cliffie... I was mean, wasn't I?**

**I would like to apologise to MarshmallowStarfish for this story being different to what it was originally going to be... I swear I'll try and write what you wanted in die Zukunft!**

**But wow. Just wow. The amount of reviews was _astronomical_! I never expected that many! Seriously, I love you all!**

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_Michael's POV: (just as wrist slitting occurs)_

I smell blood. I know I smell blood. I mean, for pete's sake, I'm a vampire: I know when there's blood.

"What, man, cat got your tongue?" Shane snarls at me. If it wasn't for the sudden distraction of blood, he wouldn't have gotten away with snarling at me: he and Eve are staying here out of the goodness of my heart because hearing they'd been killed by a vampire when I kicked them out wouldn't sit well on my conscience.

"I smell blood, idiot!" I hiss at him, my eyes contracting slightly as the scent hits my throat.

"Well you'd best be off to the fridge then, unless you want it fresh from my neck," he snaps back. I let go of his shirt and think, trying to remove the blood from my nose... It's Claire's.

"Bloody hell, Shane, that's not what I'm talking about," I say, focusing upstairs. I hear a heartbeat... But it seems to be slower than hers normally is... This isn't good. "I smell blood that is fresh and I hear it dropping on the floor."

"Who is up there? Where's Claire?" Shane looks around.

"Claire," I say, through gritted teeth.

"Well considered the fact that she is a girl and there is something called time of the month?" Shane snaps at me. I hadn't considered that... But no. No, it's too much blood to be coming out - there isn't a chance that it could just be time of the month!

"No, it isn't!"

"Oh yeah, because you know the exact difference between blood from that and a suicide, don't you, genius?" the idiot retorts, as if I'm an idiot.

"Shut the fuck up, Shane, she's in real danger!" I yell, deciding this as I push him onto the sofa before I rush upstairs. "Claire! Claire! Answer me!" I scream for Claire, using my vampire speed to head up the stairs in a flash. I rush through to her room and barge through the door, smashing it to smithereens.

She's on the bed... Her heartbeat is non existant to me. Her head is lolling forwards and both arms are hanging off the bed, the wrists dropping only dribbles of blood out now. On the floor are huge pools of crimson blood... Claire's.

"Claire!" I scream, tapping her cheeks gently to try and revive her. It doesn't work... She isn't breathing, she isn't breathing!

I dig my phone out of my pocket and call Amelie...

_Amelie's POV: (when Claire takes the pills)_

I have the strangest sense that Claire is in danger. All of a sudden, the feeling that arose in me when Sam nearly died (when he was human) is back. It's as if there is some sort of detached part of me that is feeling what Claire is... She is growing weak, sleepy.

She has taken sleeping pills.

She may be my Protectee, but that doesn't grant me specialist powers into her brain, to see how she explicitly feels or give me specialist insight into her. True, I know when she is dying (and she, I) but that is the extent of the bracelet I gave her. It doesn't go any further than that. Yet I have a hunch, one that is rather strong at the minute, that she is dying. However, I cannot be certain and for me to barge in there unannounced, just for her to be fine, would be wrong. Michael would know if she was in danger and if I was needed, he would phone. There is no need to go over there.

I continue on with my work, signing hundreds of documents after reading them thoroughly, but after seven minutes, I become certain that there is something wrong. I mean, something _seriously _wrong.

Claire is dying.

It hits me, the detached part of me joining myself as I realise this: something is causing her blood to leave her body - I can only hope that it isn't Michael draining her, as otherwise I would end up wanting to kill him... The only reason I wouldn't would be because that would upset Sam.

My phone rings and I answer it, standing up ready to head to Claire.

"Hello," I say simply, no sense of question in my tone. I didn't bother to look at the caller i.d, but they don't know that.

"Amelie, please, come quick, it's Claire," Michael's frantic voice hits me. "She's tried to kill herself... I can't hear her breathing or her heartbeat or _anything_! Amelie, I think she's dead!"

I rush towards the portal door, moving almost as fast as I did when it was Samuel on the floor of the stage, and dart up the stairs. I follow the extremely sharp and overwhelming scent of Claire's poignant blood to her room to see a destroyed door... Do they have to destroy _everything _in my house?

"Claire," I breath her name as I see the disturbing sight before me. Michael is trying, in vain, to pump her chest so that her heart starts. Her head is lolled forwards, with both arms hanging off the side of the bed, both procuring huge blood pools.

"Amelie, she's dead," Michael whispers, tears in his eyes. He jumps out of the way and wipes his bloody hands on his shirt. Evidently the worry for his friend (something more? That is what Sam felt) is more prominent in him than the monster that will be fighting for this blood.

I move closer to the body and spot the bracelet still remaining on her wrist. Of course! I strain my ears to listen to the room and I realise that there _is _the faintest of heartbeats: Michael had no chance of hearing it because of his age.

"She is alive," I whisper, pressing my hand softly against the side of her neck.

"How? I didn't hear..." Michael trails off, wondering. Then his gaze drops to Claire's changing coloured bracelet, yet he doesn't seem to respond.

"Please tell me that she's going to be ok," Shane says from behind me, sounding tearful. I spin around and turn on him in a fit of rage.

"She is moments from death, Mr Collins, I hardly doubt that that could be deemed 'ok'," I snarl. He backs away to the door, appearing rather apprehensive about Claire. He deserves to be: after the heartbreak he has put her through, cheating with her best friend... He doesn't deserve to be here - I know Claire wouldn't want him here.

"What can you do to save her?" Michael breathes, stroking Claire's hair back from her ash white face.

"The bracelet, her contract, is the only thing that is keeping her alive... If I chose to cancel the contract, she would die instantly," I say slowly. Michael nods, his face worried. "However... I can save her, with a catch. She would have to be kept on a life support machine until she has enough blood in her body and then I have to turn her. However, she would be living as I, almost... If I die, she dies also," I reveal the possibility.

"NO!" Shane explodes, almost damaging my ears with the volume. "No, you cannot turn her into, into a disgusting blood sucker!"

I whirl around to look at him again, fangs extended in anger. "Mr Collins, do you think your behaviour has gone without my noticing?" I ask, increduled that he thinks I do not know of his affair. "You play no part in Claire Danvers' life anymore. Therefore any decisions made will bear no influence from you."

"Can't you just keep her on a life support machine and wait for her to come back?" he begs, and I soften slightly.

"She is brain dead: there is no life in her, besides the beating of her heart from the bracelet," I inform him, Michael gasping in shock but too quietly for Shane to hear. "Therefore, continual life support will render pointless. She only has a chance of surviving if she is turned into a vampire and even that could be touch and go. However, you have no part of this process, as I have already said. I would like you and Ms Rosser from the house tonight," I finish, deciding that to have them in the house would not be beneficial for Claire and the entire situation.

"What? No, it's Michael's house!" Shane explodes.

"Correction, it is _my _house and I decide who lives here - therefore you can leave," I correct quietly, authority in my voice. This isn't exactly true (Michael's name is on the house deeds) but if it gets him from the house... Sam mentioned that Michael wanted them gone from the house, but didn't want to 'turf them out' into this town. "You can have Samuel's flat and he can move someplace different... But mark my words, Mr Collins, if you try and contact the residents of this house without their request, I shall have to take action," I continue, his face hardening into shock. However, I turn away and refocus on the child under my control. She is going to have to be part of me, reliant on my life status. If I die, she dies... I do not know how much further this will go, whether or not when I feed, she needs to, or whether I will feel her emotions. Yet I do not care - Claire is an important part of this world I have created and if the only way for her to be here is as a vampire, that is what shall happen.

"So... She's going to be linked to you?" Michael confirms and I nod. "If you die, she dies?"

"Correct," I say. Behind me, Shane seems to realise he isn't part of this any longer and runs off to his room - probably to pack. "Michael, are you sure about this?"

"Amelie, I cannot lose her," he says to me sharply, looking grim at me. "I cannot explain it... It sounds wrong that this could be happening after everything that has gone on, but if Claire leaves me, I doubt I could go on in life."

I nod clinically, realising that I have his full permission to act. I move over to Claire's desk in the corner and write a note for Michael to take to the hospital for the equipment we need.

_I require a full life support machine, along with seven pints of O negative blood for Claire Danvers. Give this to Michael Glass, who has delivered this note - quickly; she doesn't have long left._

**(Founders Signature here)**

After all, if Claire doesn't get the life support machine soon, even her being under my contract will be unable to save her. Her brain will have been so starved of oxygen even within fifteen minutes that turning her into a vampire will simply make her crazier than Myrnin, the only bipolar vampire in the world.

"Take this to Dr Mills, quickly," I order Michael, folding over the note for him. He nods, rushing down the stairs to the portal I left open in the living room. "Oh, Claire, please pull through," I whisper into her ear, leaning on the bed to stroke her hair back. I end up covered in her blood but it doesn't bother me - age has brought a distinct seperation between needing to kill if blood is spilt and my actions.

OoOo

"Here it is," Michael says within three minutes, lugging a large machine with him. In the other hand is a set of drips for the blood to be put into Claire's body. "Dr Mills said that if you want him to come down, just get me to go back."

"I believe that that may be helpful," I admit, realising that I haven't got the most knowledge in terms of setting up life support machines. I suppose I could call on Myrnin, but that would end up being rather complex; I believe that he has began, like Michael, to have romantic feelings for Claire (although Ada outshadows this most definitely) and for him to see her in such a way would render him useless to me. Michael disappears instantly to fetch the doctor and I prepare the machine whilst he has gone, the wires unwound and ready to be plugged in. I set up the blood stand and wait for Dr Mills to insert the blood tube into her arm - I'd rather have the expert do it, although I could.

"What happened?" Dr Mills, asks, worried for Claire.

"She tried to commit suicide," I say bluntly, noting how his face drops accordingly.

"I take it that it's touch and go?" he asks and I nod. He gets on with setting up the machine and within minutes, Claire's chest is artificially rising and falling, a blood drip in her hand. "Inform me of how she is getting on," the doctor says to Michael before disappearing from the room.

"Michael, she will be fine..." I say, not wanting to say 'I hope' on the end incase it doesn't work out how I want.

"I know," Michael says with a small sad smile. He doesn't sound as if he believes it, pulling up Claire's desk chair to sit by her side, ignoring the blood. I don't know how he does it: when I was his age, that much blood would have turned me into a ravaging monster. He takes her hand and presses his lips to it before simply holding it against his face.

"I shall come back later," I say quietly and he nods.

I walk towards the door and look back at the unfortunate soul. Why did she have to do this? Why?

"You're going to be just fine," Michael chants over and over again.

Just who is he talking to?

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**So, what you expected?**

**Please review! More chapters soon if you do! Soo many reviews last chappy - more please! I'll update when I hit 80!**

**Vicky xx**


	7. Floating

**Chapter 7:**

**Thanks to anonymous reviews - sorry I cannot reply to you all. **

***Here is a response to Anonymous Quizzler: ****I don't see how it is 'acceptable' that I spell words such as colour the way I do; English is a language bred in England and due to the fact I am ENGLISH sort of shows why I spell correctly in accordance to my country. As for 'Claire and Amelie bonding', well they're not, are they? She's simply keeping her alive through the bracelet and turning her into a vampire. As for reading ErikaOkaami's story, no. I didn't even know there was one that related to this story, as the only stories I now have time to read are Samelie or Clyrnin ones, unless someone asks me to read it. That is all* **

**(everyone else, sorry!) Enjoy the chapter!**

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_Claire's POV:_

Death is strange. This isn't anything like I imagined, floating in the middle of nowhere and nothing, having nothing to hold onto. I feel stronger, slightly, than when I remember falling into this irreversible slumber but not by much, although it seems to be increasing all the time. But this isn't what I thought. Death always seemed to be this great release for suffering, a way to end the pain and torment in your life, but it isn't. You are just stuck in Limbo, probably (if you believe in Dante's 9 levels of hell) waiting to be transported to level seven for committing suicide.

Things don't seem to be ending - everything is how it was a second ago, a minute ago, maybe even an hour ago.

I hope I'm not alive.

I can't be. I mean, I took all those tablets and then let my wrists bleed out entirely... If I am still alive, then there is something _seriously _wrong with this world.

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_Michael's POV:_

She's been like this for too long. She is artificially breathing, isn't really in this world. I'm keeping her alive because I am too selfish to let her go. If Claire died, then I truly would have no one. Eve cheated on me with my best friend, her best friend's boyfriend. Sam seems more occupied with Amelie than wanting to spend time with me. And I sincerely doubt my parents want to spend time around here, since a) they're out of Morganville (for good, thank god) and b) I'm a vampire... Dad barely managed in life with his father a vampire, so how he would be able to cope with seeing his son as a vampire needs to be questioned.

She's the only one who is bothered about me, truly. I don't know what this is for her that I feel for her, but it's certainly different than Eve and anything before: this seems slow and long lasting, rather than hot and convenient... I mean, we live together!

"Michael," Shane says, lingering by the door. He looks bashful, holding all of his stuff, but I don't care. I look up at him coolly, holding his gaze so he doesn't dare look at Claire. He put her into this position - he doesn't deserve to look at her, ever again, unless she wants to talk to him again. "Look, I'm sorry..." he continues, but I entirely ignore him.

"Goodbye Shane," I say with no emotion in my voice. He seems to get the message and walks away, his head dipped in shame. Now he has gone, I revert my attention to Claire, squeezing her hand lightly to see if she has increased her body temperature anymore. Earlier, Dr Mills returned to stitch up her wrists, wrapping them in bandages so that the blood being put into her body isn't leaked out again. "Claire, come on," I whisper, urging her to get better... Why did she do it? Why did she want to leave this world, leave me, without even talking about it? Why didn't she even tell anyone?

If I wasn't a vampire, it would have been hours by the time she was found. There would have been no chance that she would survive, even with this bracelet that has let her stay within this world currently... Even though it's a temporary measure. There's a strong chance that this will all go wrong, that she was starved of oxygen and such for so long that even turning her into a vampire won't save her. If that happened, I don't know how I'd live...

"Michael, I need to put more blood in," Dr Mills says to me gently, motioning to the blood bad in his hand. I nod, holding my breath so that the blood doesn't overcome me, and move out of the way. I stand on the opposite side of the room and fight to remain in control: the blood, it's intoxicating. Claire's didn't bother me because I couldn't stand to hurt her anymore - I've grown used to smelling it every now and again - but whilst it is being inserted into her body, I don't know if I'd be able to refrain myself from draining the bloodbag.

"All done," the doctor says with a strained smile, moving around the bed to check Claire's machine and obs. "She'll be fine, Michael, if Amelie is involved," he reassures me, but it doesn't work. It's almost as if he's trying to reassure himself that everything he does, has done, has been right and he has helped save her.

I don't say anything, simply sit back down in the chair next to Claire and hold her hand. I hear him walking out of the room and down the stairs, heading out of the front door without another word.

"Come on, Claire, you don't want to leave me," I whisper in her ear, squeezing her hand tighter and tighter before something tells me to stop. She's broken enough - I cannot break her anymore.

I don't know how long I stay like this, eyes shut, praying iternally for Claire to get better, to survive. However, suddenly, Amelie is in the room: the only realisation I have of this is her clearing her throat - how long has she neem standing there?

"Michael, you need to feed," she chastises me gently, looking worried for me.

"I can't leave her," I murmur but she shakes her head.

"I'll stay with her," Sam's voice comes round the door, and I hear him enter the room. My eyes snap open and I see his familiar form entering the room. I miss hanging out with him on the weekends Dad allowed it, when I went around for Sunday lunch. It was always awkward as it didn't really happen often, as Dad kicked off when Sam wanted to be in our lives too much, (he didn't even want me to call him Grandad... "He's a vampire, Michael, he doesn't deserve to have that title," he would say) and when I went round, we would eat in silence. When I was younger it was better, as Sam would play with me with all the toys he had bought for me, but as I aged, I didn't know what to do. We had fun when we played video games but then, one day, I blew up at him and refused to see him again. It was just after my parents left Morganville forever, but before Oliver came and turned me into a ghost; that's why he didn't push to have me come to see him at the weekend again. He just let me be... The one time that I _wanted_, really wanted, to have him come and see me, he didn't. He came during the day, when I was a ghost, but never came when I was able to see him...

But that is beyond the current point. He's here now, here for Claire, and he is actually seeing me, rather than just being with Amelie.

"I'm fine," I protest, some inner child wanting to rebel against the adults in my life.

"No, Michael, you need to feed otherwise Claire could be in danger," Sam counterargues, not bothering to even pretend that Claire wouldn't be in danger from me.

I realise he's right; Claire's heart (even though the beat is artificial) is making my mouth water without me realising and the iv line full of blood is making my throat ache. I've managed to detach it from me until now but I realise just how much I need blood... I don't want to hurt her, I don't want to destroy her myself.

"Fine," I relent, my bottom lip (of it's own accord) sticking out. Sam smiles wanly before sitting down on the opposite side of the bed to where I am, and taking Claire's other hand. Amelie lingers at the end and I get the feeling she is waiting for me to leave before she sits down where I am.

As I walk out of the room, my suspicions are confirmed, as she sits down lightly before talkinf to Sam too quietly.

I relent entirely and rush down for the blood that will mean I can return to Claire quicker...

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_Claire's POV:_

Floating. That's what it is. It's just drifting, stuck between the world of the living and the dead.

I have no physical form. I have nothing but thoughts and memories: memories of Shane and I together, happy; memories of Michael playing the guitar and of Sam just grinning happily. The people I love: thank god my parents died, so they won't have to see my body.

I just left that job to the people I adore.

Michael... I wish I hadn't left him. He's alone, with two people who betrayed him, without me since Amelie finally accepted Sam as her partner. He has nobody but me...not really. Why did I abandon him?

Shane... I cannot feel anger towards him, in this state, nor to Eve. They did what they did and I will always love them, no matter what actions divided us all. Perhaps... If I had lived, perhaps I would have forgiven them.

But I chose the easy course. I chose suicide over working through the pain and suffering, because I thought I had nobody. I was wrong.

Michael is here for me... He _was _here for me. Myrnin was here for me... Sam was here for me, and I even suppose Amelie, and dare I say _Oliver_, also. I had a support network, just they all seemed to be vampires. Trust me to hae chosen a death that would draw them all together - not for the reason I want...

Yet I shall not dwell now. I shall relinquish every hold with Earth and move on... It's what I want, now I'm here...

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**What did you think?**

**Sorry for any divulgence with Michael&Sam... If this story is going to be quite long, it needs some plot development etc... I've written a oneshot on the argument, called Because He's A Vampire**

**Please review! I accidentally wrote 80, rather than 70, last time but 85 this chapter would be great!**

**I'm off to Ireland now, so lots of reviews would be nice!**

**Vicky xx**


	8. I'll Do It

**Chapter 8: **

**Thank you to everyone who has reviewed and read this story!**

**10/3/10 was the date I joined FF... so my anniversary commemoration is now, a week late! Enjoy the chapter!**

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_Amelie's POV:_

"Do I do it now, whilst he is not in the room?" I ask Sam, as I sit on the chair his grandson only recently vacated.

My... I don't know what he is to me, if I am honest... _Sam _thinks about this a moment before shaking his head. "If you did that, then he wouldn't have had chance to say goodbye if it all goes wrong. Wait a couple o' hours... If she cannot survive much longer, do it then. But not now," he explains his reasoning for believing this as well as giving his answer. Urgh! Why cannot men stick to _what we want_? When we want a short 'yes' or 'no' answer, we get waffle, but when we _want _a long and detailed answer, we are lucky if we get a shrug!

"Fine," I say coolly, pointedly annoyed with him. However, he doesn't seem to notice this, simply staring down at Claire, dutifully looking after her as he told Michael he would.

Claire. You _silly _child! Why would you want to kill yourself? Please, when you wake up, don't be silly enough to say that it was because you were heartbroken because I was for fifty years and, look, I'm still here! Oh, Claire, you had better be alright otherwise I am going to kill somebody else to get them to follow through to the afterlife with you, to ensure you are ok.

"Amelie, it's ok to be upset, you know," Sam says suddenly, his brilliant blue eyes piercing my skin to read my emotions below. Who knows _what _my face is betraying?

"Why did she do it, Sam?" I ask him quietly, feeling his hand reach over the bed, over Claire, to take my own gently. Tears well in my eyes as I try to think of any plausible reason why she would... I come up blank.

"I don't know, dear, I really don't," he says, slightly distracted. "But you are going to be able to ask her that yourself, do you understand? She's going to be fine; you can save her..."

"What if I can't? What if... I never considered this possibility, but what if because I am keeping her alive, I cannot turn her into a vampire?" I wildly exclaim, knowing it is a distinctly plausible possibility to occur.

"Then I shall do it," he soothes me carefully. "Amelie, stop worrying! Everything will be ok, well as ok as anything can be in this situation. Just think: in a normal case, you wouldn't be able to do anything whatsoever. At least this time you are able to give her a second chance at life, to keep her alive. Please, Amelie, relax and don't worry; everything has a positive side to it - everything!" he finishes with a small smile, which I reciprocate. Then I pull my hand from his and refocus on the unfortunate child between us. She needs to survive... She has to!

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_Michael's POV:_

Blood. It's what keeps me alive; it nourishes my organs and makes sure that I can focus and move. It also keeps Claire alive, doing the exact same thing, but in a different way. She is able to produce her own blood and uses it differently, to keep her alive as it pumps through her veins, providing key nutrients to her organs.

I rush back upstairs and head into Claire's room, standing behind my grandfather, waiting for him to move. He turns and looks at me, realising just how frantic I am to be with Claire... I need her.

"Come on Amelie," Sam says, standing up after looking at me for a long time. "Michael... Can I speak with you tomorrow?" he asks me; what could he want? Since we had that argument before I turned into a ghost, I haven't really spoken to him: it was Eve that wanted to ask Sam to help when Shane was in trouble, not me. And everything else that has happened, Sam has been involved because of Amelie and everything involved with her... Sam hasn't actually spoken to me individually since I yelled at him pointlessly... For three or four years, we haven't spoke properly - it seems to me that he prefers Claire than me. He always worries about her... I sound like such a spoilt brat, someone caring more for someone else than for me, but when he's meant to have always wanted to spend time with you and now he ignores you, it isn't very nice.

"I suppose," I say dismissively, not sure if I want to or not. I know that I want to spend time with Claire right now, without the influence of Sam or Amelie around.

"I'll come back in a few hours, Michael," Amelie says pointedly, and I realise that these are my last hours with her, really. She won't be human anymore... She may not even be 'alive' anymore after Amelie tries to turn her.

"Whatever," I mutter, turning back to Claire to look at her sleeping form. Behind me, I hear the adults leaving the room, leaving me with Claire...

OoOo

Something is wrong. Something isn't as it should be with Claire; it's more than her being on a life support machine – even on it she isn't breathing now. She isn't breathing.

She is going to die.

I know, somewhere inside of me, that I should run for Amelie, but I cannot. I am too rooted to Claire, too unable to leave her side to do this. So what should I do? Could I… surely not!

Could _I _turn her into a vampire?

I mean, I was turned into a vampire… I know how it works. I drink some of her blood and then give her some of mine before waiting for her body to complete the change. It isn't life threatening – at least I don't think. I heard Amelie earlier worrying that because she is the one keeping Claire alive, through the bracelet, that she will not be able to turn her: I would rather turn my Claire than Sam. I suppose it is sort of a territorial thing – this is my house and my friend and why should he get to be part of everything that I am in life? Petulant, I know, but I cannot face it.

I am going to change her myself.

I make this decision in a split second, deciding that although there may be difficulties, they cannot be too bad. Any ideas of it going wrong are pushed out of my head as I decide the best way to do this: it must be done _now_, but do I bite her neck or what? What do I do? Do I dare bite her, or simply remove her blood for fear that once I begin to drink I won't be able to stop? Is this the reason why young vampires don't make new vampires? Is it because they cannot stop the bloodlust inside of them, the bloodlust that will turn them crazy if they have the chance to drink from a human being, with a beating heartbeat?

I lower myself over her and extend my fangs, breathing heavily; is this right? What do I do? However, I simply allow instincts to take over and hover over the point where her pulse is the strongest, the easiest place for me to remove the blood from her body…

I strike, instantly feeling her soft and delicate skin pierce beneath my sharp fangs, allowing my mouth to fill with her tangy crimson blood. It is delicious – so much more so than I imagined – and I swallow it, instantly craving more. I drink and drink until I believe that it is about 80% of her blood (how much Amelie stole from me) – I hope that she cannot feel this, in her unconscious state – and then I act.

I wrench myself out of her neck, her blood dripping in droplets down my chin, and raise my own wrist to my mouth, digging my fangs in and _yanking_ so that the skin breaks. Instantly, the blood begins to spurt out, so I lower it into Claire's open mouth, the red of her lips standing out against her deathly pale skin.

The blood begins to fill up in her mouth, but I begin to weaken before it has even gotten half full. What's wrong? Why isn't this working? She isn't moving or doing anything whatsoever – has this not worked? She isn't swallowing… maybe my blood isn't good enough as a new vampire; maybe it takes years and years to build up something in you that allows you to turn humans into vampires.

The wound heals on my wrist and I remove it from her mouth, seeing no point in it remaining there. I stare at her, focusing on her so much that I don't realise that my balance is going. I loose all consciousness and fall to the floor, blacking out as I do so…

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_Third person perspective:_

He falls to the floor next to the bed, unconscious from the effort exerted in his actions. He doesn't know it but…

…something is changing in Claire Danvers… but will he be alive to know it?

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**What did you think?**

**I hope you enjoyed it!**

**I'm hoping to get some Eve or Shane POV in here soon, as well as BACK TO CLAIRE! Whoop, it's gonna be epic!**

**So, like, review and you get the next chapter! Yano the drill... please, you'd be awesome if you did!**

**Vicky xx**


	9. Why Did I Do It?

**Chapter 9: **

**Lots of requests for Shane/Eve's POV, hence this chappy... For those of you who were wondering what happened to Michael or Claire, wait another chapter :)**

**I don't own anything...**

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_Shane's POV:_

I was wrong. I acted stupidly, idiotically, and I thought that I would never get caught. Eve and I got too complacent, thinking that we would never get caught. I don't know why we did it; I mean, I love Claire and Eve loves Michael - we just got bored, I think. I never wanted to hurt Claire; I never thought she would find out.

When Michael found out, I thought he was going to kill us. We were _together _in my room and just suddenly I looked up and he was there: he looked so hurt, but as if there was a significant part of him that wanted to tear us both limb from limb. Eve got up and ran after him, begging for him to forgive her and for him not to tell Claire.

The last was a condition he agreed - he would continue to act as normal with Claire, with all of us when she was around, because she didn't deserve to find out the way that he did. I always suspected that he had feelings for her, and this exactly showed these feelings in more intensity.

She wasn't supposed to find out. It was supposed to be that I would split up with her in the future, sometime soon, and then later down the line I would be able to get together with Eve... I love Claire but I also love Eve and it isn't as if Michael would allow us to just 'forget' that this had happened - no, we would have had to split up. This house is so damned complicated - I love both girls, Eve loves both boys, Claire probably loves both of us and Michael definitely loves Claire (Eve has probably gone now, since he saw exactly what I was doing to her) so I think that this is pretty damned complicated.

I wanted to die when she found us: she wasn't supposed to! Michael was out, she was out, so that was the time when we were supposed to be able to do this together without Claire finding us. However, she found us together, me on top of her best friend: I'm not surprised that she reacted that she reacted the way she did. I would have done, if she was with Michael.

I never expected that she would come out and actually talk to me - I knew that she hated me and that made me sure that she wouldn't come out. However, she did and she shocked me with what happened... I thought that she would actually forgive me, but she refused to! I accidentally revealed my suspicions (accidentally) about her and Michael and that's what we argued about when she... When she went upstairs to kill herself.

I didn't understand when Michael suddenly tensed up, listening upstairs. I thought it was something simple, like that she was rushing away to pack: I'd never have expected her to be fucking committing suicide! I mean, for god's sake, why would she want to kill herself? Sure I've hurt her, but she shouldn't have tried to kill herself... Why would she want to remove herself from this earth, leaving me without her? I love her so much, it's ridiculous.

Amelie banning me from being involved in her care, anything to do with the decisions to make for her future, was horrible... Especially when she told me to move out of the house with Eve... When she implied Eve was a whore was too far - but I see why; Eve destroyed Claire's happiness, along with me.

"Eve, have you heard anything?" I blurt out as soon as she walks through the door into this flat we now call home. Sam's flat - it's ours now, since he moved into Amelie's house literally hours ago so that we could move out of the Glass House and into the flat - is small and pretty much unfurnished but I'm hoping that Claire is going to want to take me back once she's a vampire... That sounds strange, doesn't it, that I don't care that Claire is going to turn into something I hate; yet the alternative is death, so I think I'm preferring this option.

"No, there's been absolutely nothing," Eve whispers and I pull her in for a hug. There's nothing romantic about it, we're both just desperately worried for Claire. She may not have been there (Eve) but that doesn't mean that she doesn't know what happened... I'm glad she wasn't there because I'm still seeing Claire in my mind, pale and broken, huge crimson blood pools on the floor... Oh God, I think I'm going to be sick right now!

I wish I could take everything back. Yet that is impossible... And after all, would I choose Eve or Claire...?

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_Amelie's POV:_

I must return soon, to turn her. To be rather frank, I don't think it is actually going to work: I am keeping her alive, through the bracelet, and I truly doubt that I shall be able to turn her. Samuel is probably going to be unable to resist her blood, Myrnin will be unable to do the same since he was so _lax _about drinking blood when he was ill, and I cannot allow Oliver to know how to turn someone into a vampire... We may be 'on the same side' currently, but I cannot allow this crucial piece of information to get to him: he already has an idea of how it happens, but only myself, Michael (I believe) Samuel and Myrnin know fully. If Oliver knew, I would be under a great risk.

I manage to tear my gaze from the setting sun through the tinted window, and refocus on the room and my mission.

"Come on, Samuel, we need to return," I say urgently, pulling him up from his position on the sofa.

"Relax, Amelie, everything will be the same," he says slowly, resisting me directing him where to go. I understand he is tired since he has just had to move everything from his old home into my house since I gave his flat to the cheating children...

"Well excuse me for being worried," I say sharply before walking out. He hesitates before following me out, but much more slowly than my own extreme speed.

I flash through the portal and up the stairs, wondering why I can't hear _anything _from upstairs.

"Sam!" I yell for the love of my life, shocked scared and horrified. "Sam, please, come quick!" I scream, as the horror of the scene before me unfolds.

Claire lying on the bed, entirely lifeless even with the machine.

And Michael lying on the floor beside her...

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**What did you think?**

**Please review! More reviews please, me encanta los!**

**Vicky xx**


	10. Pain Is Something I Thought I Lost

**Chapter 10:**

**I hope you're like still enjoying the story!**

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_Claire's POV:_

Pain. It is the thing that I thought I'd managed to get rid of in my life, with my suicide.

I was wrong.

It is back and back with a vengeance, dragging me back into the land of the living, no matter how much I try and resist; I don't _want_ to come back – I tried to kill myself for a reason, I wanted it to be successful! For god's sake, how am I being saved? I died a long time ago, hovering here… oh, hovering. I've been hovering for such a long time; they must have found a way to hold me between the worlds…

Someone grabs my body and begins to sink their fangs into me… they're draining me… but I have no blood, don't I? The pain is abstract, as I am abstract in my body; I am here, but I don't have any control or senses or anything – I simply am existing in the inner core of my body.

At least I now know that I am back alive and not dead; gone has the belief that I managed to kill myself… oh Claire, you can't even do something as taking your own life properly! No wonder Shane didn't want you; you probably never gave him anything he wanted or anything – that's why he cheated. Don't forget that, Claire, he cheated on you because you weren't right and were just stupid and different and not what people want from you. You're just a… no; I need to stop berating myself and thinking that Shane cheated on me because I am different or whatever.

But this pain is real, and I seem to be coming more and more to the surface of my body rather than just being a passenger in it. I am able to feel and hear when something slumps to the floor, but nothing more… there is a sense of heat coming in my body and that things are changing but I don't know what; all I want to do is to sleep, and that is what I shall try to do.

I try to sink back down into the depths of my empty shell, but I can't.

Amelie is here.

Shit. Shit. Shit. Why the hell is she here, saving me from whatever she thinks has gone on: my attempted suicide (which must have been hours ago now) and then someone trying to drain me.

"Claire," she whispers my name and I want to respond, to twitch my finger of the hand which she is holding but I can't. The pain returns and hits me like a rocket, even worse than before; I presume that my blocking out of it simply intensified it so that it would do this.

It is setting my brain on fire… I cannot concentrate… I cannot do _anything_ but think of this agony and how it is changing me, changing my normal (if slightly addled) brain into something different. Once it has finished with this, the pain spreads through my body and hits my vital organs, my limbs… everything. It doesn't leave anything alone, attacking it all, but retreats from everywhere after a while… besides my throat.

NO!

No. I mean, is it true? Is this my turning into a vampire? Did someone turn me into a vampire in order to save me? Oh god… is this what I want? I don't know… I never considered being a vampire, but evidently this is what I am going to become.

Oh god.

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_Amelie's POV (a little earlier):_

"Amelie, what is- oh my GOD!" Sam begins as he walks up the stairs before realising what has gone on. "Michael, can you hear me? Michael!" he shakes the shoulders of his comatose grandson, picking him up and setting him on the chair as he slaps his cheek to try and revive him.

"He's tried to turn her," I whisper through unmoving lips before taking Claire's hand. "Claire, can you hear me?" I ask her quietly, blocking out Samuel and his attempts to bring back Michael – I need Claire to come back right now.

Some people may wonder why I am focusing so much on saving a human life, why I seem so concerned for Claire. The answer is simple: she has done so much for me and Morganville, I cannot allow her to die without a possibility of a second chance. I cannot. It wouldn't be right and I couldn't allow myself to let _her_ die without at least offering her this chance to learn forever, the same reason why Myrnin wanted to become a vampire – I couldn't do it.

"Come on, Claire," I whisper to her motionless body... But is that something changing? Has... Has her skin _really _turned cooler, harder, or am I imagining it because I know what Michael tried to do?

There is a reason why young vampires don't make new ones - it is because you need power to turn a human into a vampire and a young one (less than fifty, I would say, although very few know how to) doesn't have that power. Michael put too much of himself into turning Claire and now he is unconscious... She has semi-turned, but she shall stay frozen like this (and Michael unconscious) until they are rescued. It takes immense power to do this, and I am willing to do it.

"Bring him over here, Sam, quickly!" I urge him, rolling up my sleeves as to get a better feel for the situation. Then I lift Claire's left arm and place it under Michael's right once he is on the bed beside her.

"What are you doing?" Sam asks, shocked and confused.

"There is but one way to save them," I inform him, raising my wrist slowly to my mouth. "Michael's actions have formed a bond between them but it is weak and fragile, hence their states of being. However, if I give Michael blood, he shall pass through some of this power inserted into him to Claire, and she shall be fully turned. I shall require to give rather a substantial amount of blood but this shall save them both, rather than having to deal with them both separately."

He doesn't answer, simply looks stunned that this is what lengths I have to go to in order to save his grandson and Claire. I take this as him wanting no input to the events, so simply rip my wrist open and pour the blood into Michael's mouth, hearing his body naturally swallow the blood.

_Oh Claire, come back to us..._

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_Claire's POV:_

Ow... This is strange. I must be about halfway through the turning process - and by no means entirely happy with it - but it has just halted. It's stopped... As if there wasn't enough power to complete it, so it simply decided to grind to a halt. But if Amelie turned me, then there shouldn't be a problem with power, should there? She is the most powerful vampire in the world: if she can't turn me, then I really ought to be dead!

Suddenly, I realise that I can feel - I'm on a bed and Michael is next to me, his hand on top of mine. Is there a purpose to this? Is he helping me become a vampire or what? I don't have a bloody clue but this is just rubbish so far; I don't think that anything is what I want.

Power... Heat... Strength... These are the things that flow through Michael's hand into my body; these are the things that continue the smouldering process of turning... The pain increases and I realise that I'm regaining my senses: I can hear so much clearer; I can smell scents that I never would have been able to before; I can taste... My own blood... my throat aches to be able to drink it, to lick up the remnants of the blood pools from when I slit my wrists... But I don't want to do that, I don't want to be a disgusting vampire.

My eyes suddenly shoot open and I marvel for a moment at the clarity in which I can now see. However, at the same time, my throat burns... And part of my heart seems to suddenly become occupied; part of my soul becomes something different. Is this part of being a vampire? I don't know, but I'll soon find out since Amelie is suddenly hovering over me.

"Are you alright?" she asks in a voice weaker than I have ever heard before. It's weaker than even when she was staked - this is worrying.

I shake my head, my arms clawing at my throat to try and alleviate the pain coursing through it. I fight to remain in control, to not let the monster within out of its chains and allow it to rush outside... Where there are humans, heartbeats, _body temperatured blood..._NO! Stop thinking about it because it's not going to happen - you are not going to drink human blood from a living human! That isn't you... So don't even think about it.

My eyes drop down to the still immobile body of Michael beside me... The body of someone who seems to be bonded to my heart somehow... The body of someone who will die if I do.

The body of someone who will kill me if he dies.

Suddenly, the urge to kill something fades as I realise I need him.

But I need Shane as well.

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**So, whatcha think? Yay, we're finally back to Claire's POV, mainly, from now on!**

**Please review! Remember, I said that when I get more reviews, I update faster (hence the update)!**

**I wrote a story called 'The Fight To Be The Eldest' which could _certainly_ be beneficial to something that could happen later in the story. So please read that and review!**

**Vicky xx**


	11. Resurrections

**Chapter 11: **

**Thanks to you amazing people who reviewed... you others who are reading, remember this: I AM WATCHING YOU!**

**I have a story called, The Fight To Be The Eldest, and the events in that will have something to do with this story, later down the line. So check it out please!**

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_Claire's POV (yes, she's back!):_

"Blood, Claire," Amelie prods me gently and I nod, sitting upright. I slide off the bed and wobble, not at all used to this way of being alive or being this hungry... Well, I guess it is thirsty, isn't it?

Sam races out the room and I hear him head down the stairs; it's _weird_, being able to hear a vampire, much less track their process downstairs and his actions in the kitchen.

I turn to look at Michael and feel a stab of pain at my immobile heart at seeing him like this; I'm awake, even though I tried to kill myself, so why isn't he waking up when I am?

"Amelie, why is he still unconscious?" I ask her, a note of definite panic in my voice. He's definitely going to be important to me, especially if he was the one who turned me: I guess that in most cases there is some sort of bond formed... But I think that since he saved my life in such a way, there's been an even stronger bond formed. I need to know he's alright...

"Hush, child, he is merely sleeping," she soothes me, her voice tender and calm. She carefully places an arm around my shoulder and pulls me across the room, setting me down in one of the chairs... Wasn't that chair downstairs before? "Now... Do you care to tell me why you acted the way you did _now_, or would you rather wait until after you have had some blood?" she changes the subject to something I would rather not talk about... I have a feeling that she will not let me go without explaining.

"After," I mutter, looking over at the sleeping body (on my bed) of Michael.

"Very well," she says, the tenderness abruptly gone from her voice. She stands to the side of me, hovering almost, as Sam begins to make his way up the stairs. The smell of the blood suddenly hits me and it is all I can do to not run for it.

"Ow," I murmur, falling to the floor with my hands on my throat to try and dull the burning. It simply makes it worse with the movement and I whimper, trying to hold my breath so that the deliciously perfect _intoxicating _scent of the blood Sam is carrying. He's coming closer and closer and I can tell that the blood is only 10m from me... 9m... It's getting closer and as it does, I feel the monster rising in me. It wants the blood, that is all it wants...

"Here you go," Sam says gently but I ignore him. My body moves of its own accord, my arm shooting out to grab the warmed bottle of blood, my focus entirely on it. It's all I want... My fangs pierce through my gums for the first time but the pain is masked by the sudden addition of the blood to my body. The thick liquid crawls down my throat as I _attempt _to savour it, but I fail miserably as it just goes crashing down my throat; it is too nice, too perfect, to be drank slowly.

I feel a sudden surge of energy as the life saving addition surges through my veins, feeding every major organ in my body so I can function. I smile as the blood covered fangs retract into their gums and the crimson tinge to my eyes fades back to normal: I feel absolutely fricking amazing! I never thought I'd be able to say this but it feels better to be a vampire than a human!

Michael suddenly sits upright and gazes blankly in our direction before he focuses on me. Through my peripheral vision, I see Amelie looking at us in confusion and I know what she's thinking: _they must be more linked than I thought..._

"Claire, are you alright?" Michael asks me in a hurry. Even with vampire vision, I barely see him shooting across the room to be holding me in his arms, pulling me into him. I wrap my arms around him and just breathe in his familiar scent, heightened now of my vampire senses. It seems strange to be calling myself a vampire since I had been hoping to die not even half an hour ago; I wanted to end my life... And the worst thing is, I don't really know why.

"I'm fine... How are you?" I ask him and he snorts slightly before pulling away. His expression turns serious and he looks me right in the eye, his gaze reaching right into my soul. I shiver but hold his attention, not looking away from him: he will not win!

"Care to explain _why _all this had to happen?" he says, slightly irritated with me. He throws an arm out and gestures around the room, causing my face to turn cold. I know I must be paler and colder anyway, since I've been a vampire for all of the past fifteen minutes _max_, but for me to feel it, it must be a pretty big temperature change.

He seems to realise that I suddenly cannot move, frozen by the fear of having to discuss what happened to me. That's why he softens his facial expression to merely disapproving and stops staring _quite _so intently at me, instead having his eyes flicker about the room, not settling on one place for more than a few seconds.

"Erm," I stall and Amelie clicks her tongue, exasperated.

"For heaven's _sake _Claire, I haven't all day!" she snaps and I turn robotically to look at her. Seeing her delicate frame wracked with anger causes tears to suddenly flow down my cheeks; why is she so angry with me? When I cry, however, she doesn't soften a smidgen so Sam steps in.

"We'll come back later, _won't we Amelie_?" he says, his hands on her shoulders. She relaxes at his touch and nods, knowing that she can come back later; I am unable to stop her doing as she wishes. It is miraculous enough that she is allowing me to simply talk to Michael and probably allowing Michael to tell her, rather than me telling her myself... I don't know if I'd be able to go through it two times.

"One hour," she says to Michael, to me, and they both walk out of the room. They leave me alone with Michael… something I both want and don't want at the same time. I don't think that I can cope with relaying the terrible events to him… especially not in this room. Preferably not in this _house_ but it is probably sunlight hours so I don't think it would be the _best_ idea for a brand new vampire to step out into the sunlight, would it? It is _slightly_ better for Michael, since he is over a year old now, but when you have _literally_ just been made, it probably shouldn't happen for a bit!

"Claire?" Michael prods me gently, looking at me with a small smile. I shake into normality again and shrug with a sense of being myself again… but I need Shane. Even if only just to talk to him to ask him why he did it, I need to talk to him. However, bringing this up to Michael now hardly seems the _best_ idea, since Shane is partially what caused me to do this… actually, he's probably the reason I did.

"Where d'you wanna talk?" I ask him, turning my gaze to the back wall. I cannot look at my bed, where I have spent the last who knows how long lying in my own blood. "Actually, d'you mind if I get changed first? Since, even though it is my own blood, it is sort of driving my head insane," I say, noting for the first time how it _is_ troubling my head and throat. Seriously, why am I so disgusting that I would want to drink my own blood?

His expression softens and he nods, his hand reaching out to stroke my cheek softly… it feels nice yet alien at the same time… but who cares, right?

"Sure, I'll be in the secret room if you want?" he asks and I nod. That seems the best place; Shane and I may have gone up there together but it was infrequent and the only room in the goddamn house that his scent won't be as strong there. It is already doing my _head in_… it seems like that is all I can smell, imagine his warm body on the bed… NO! Stop thinking about it, otherwise you will go insane!

Michael walks towards the door and I marvel how I am able to see his every movement in so much clarity – it seems slower as well; it seems more lifelike and natural… probably because I can move at almost the same speed now. However, I presume that if I saw Amelie or Oliver moving I'd be barely able to see them… well, Amelie at least. Oliver is goddamn old but he is only about a quarter of Amelie's age, I think. Myrnin and probably Pennywell are older than him – but they didn't register on the Elder's Council, did they?

He turns back suddenly, moving quicker than I thought; maybe only seconds ago he was moving at _my_ speed, so I wasn't too freaked out… or maybe I can move at this speed as well.

"Claire, you'll get used to the bloodlust, honestly," he says to me, emotion in his voice. "I know; I went through it as well. It feels like it is going to destroy you at times and at others it is pretty much non-existent. So just relax and I'll see you in a few minutes – don't use the how long it took me to get ready excuse anymore, since you can move faster!" he ends on a slight joke before disappearing to give me my privacy.

I begin to remove the disgusting clothing of the past however long, holding my breath as the dried blood suddenly hits my throat; my own blood didn't bother me before but since I drank the blood Sam brought up it seems to be annoying me and inflicting pain _on my own body_! Sheesh, body, get a grip and a sense of normality!

So I change and then pull a brush through my hair, for some reason wanting to make myself appear pretty to Michael. I shrug to myself as I ask the question to myself that I _know_ he is going to ask:

Why did you do it?

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**What do you think? **

**Decided to have the conversation next chapter as (hopefully) it could be pretty long and stuff…**

**Please review! I WATCH YOU ALL! And if you don't review, then I think you don't want to read the story... if I don't think you want to read, then I either focus my efforts on other MV stories or even the SVM ones I've started! You have been warned... maybe... if I were evil...**

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**AND please check out 'alchemy of the heart' -this is a story I am co-opting writing with Lady Aiyaka... it's gonna be interesting!**

**Vicky xx**


	12. My Id In Control

**Chapter 12:**

_Claire's POV:_

As I suspected, it's pretty intense.

"Claire, I still don't get it… you decided to kill yourself without an actual reason?" Michael repeats what I said, pretty much, and I nod.

"Well, I was pretty screwed up and I didn't really know what I was doing; all I knew was that I wanted an escape from it all and suicide seemed the only option open to me," I say slowly, quietly, and put my head in my hands. Tears leak into the corners of my eyes and he reaches over to comfort me, pulling me into his arms. "Why did everything bad have to happen to _us_, Michael? I mean, whenever something _ever_ began to go well in life, something bad had to happen!"

He nods his head thoughtfully and I look up from my hands to stare into his face.

"I don't know, Claire, I really don't," he admits. Then he reminds me of something, something which I wanted an answer to before but didn't really either know how to ask and also didn't get chance to ask before I tried to kill myself. I can't believe I was out for only less than a day – in that time, Shane and Eve have already moved out and everything is different. Oh yeah and I'm a vampire – that's the biggie!

"Michael, why did you continue to pretend that everything was normal after you found out about them?" I ask him, my voice hard and cold.

"I was trying to protect you," he whispers, but that only makes me angrier. It's strange, being angry for the first time in a new body –it is so much stronger and more aggressive than before.

"You _dare_ try and use that excuse and I will kill you!" I explode, standing up and feeling the anger overtake my body entirely. I want to attack, I want to strike him to the floor and try and kill him… but he is my friend. I can't do it; also, there is the preservation instinct in me that _knows_ he is older and more powerful than me so I wouldn't exactly fair well in that fight.

"Claire, what's wrong?" he asks me in a gentle and caring tone, but this simply makes me madder.

"You kept something as big as this from me!" I exclaim, standing up to try and prove my point but this fails miserably. He's still almost as tall as me _sitting down _when I'm standing. That's just depressing.

"To try and protect you!" he tries to protest, but I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear his 'reasons', his flawed belief that what he did was for me. It's just utter bull. I can't believe that he would do that!

"No, Michael, don't say that!" I yell at him, not wanting to hear his warped idea of how to protect me because it just cannot be true. After all, I never asked for him to protect me – I mean, did he rather that I was entirely in the dark with a cheating boyfriend and best friend instead of knowing and being able to act properly. "I cannot say for sure that I would have acted differently if I had known earlier, in a better fashion than what I did, but I'm pretty sure it would have been different," I sigh, dropping my tone. His head shoots up to meet my gaze as he processes my basic admission that it's probably his fault that I acted the way I did and my human life ended so abruptly. I know it's probably flawed and that he _really_ didn't have anything to do with my decision making, but right now it seems pretty damn nice to be able to have someone to blame.

"Let me get this straight; you're now blaming _me_ for you taking a bunch of tablets and then trying to slit your wrists?" he says callously, with a touch of incredulity to his tone. I wince at his wording, the reminder of what I did not exactly helpful when I'm still trying to get used to a) being a vampire and b) process what I did.

"I… I guess so," I say uncertainly. "After all, if you hadn't have came into the room when Shane was with me then you wouldn't have been arguing with him and then I wouldn't have had a chance to sneak off and grab a knife and some pills, would I?" I argue back, hiding the weak spots in my armour so that he cannot hurt me when he attacks back. I know that he is going to; I know Michael would never give in so quickly.

He stands up to face me and stares into my face, annoyance, anger and a little disgust on his face. I see similar emotions underneath, however, to what I used to see in Shane's eyes, which confuse me slightly. Nonetheless, this no longer bothers me when he begins to yell back at me.

"It's now _my_ fault that you were so selfish to try and take your own life?" he confirms. "When all I was doing was _protecting_ you from him, trying to make you not be weak and scared and in pain, it is my fault that you tried to do something that you even managed to screw up! Look at the stats, Claire; most people who want to commit suicide actually manage to do it."

I gasp – has he just called me weak and unable to do something as simple as suicide? It's not my fault that he came upstairs and saved me, when I was almost gone… or maybe the bracelet? I don't know _how_ I am still standing here but I presume Amelie shall take extreme joy in telling me, then informing me how I am indebted to her.

"Are you insinuating-?" I begin, before he cuts me off.

"_Yes_ I am insinuating, but please don't use language like that – you have no one to impress here, and I'd prefer it if you kept it to my level," he begins snapping but by the end is trying to lighten the mood. However, I don't see that; he just called me a lot of names and expects me to be ok with that?

I struggle to keep my head as I look into his perfectly blue eyes, his golden hair hanging loose over his forehead. I manage to draw on my strength and tear my gaze away, ignoring the slightly hungry look on his face – since I'm newly turned so still full of human blood, does that make me more appealing to him?

"I truly have no idea how to respond to such a hurtful statement," I say slowly, anger ebbing away now. I see why Myrnin is able to move from mood to mood so damned quickly – my mood is like a switch which I could probably change to lustful within less than a second. "But I shall try; I'm going to go and pack my bags and I'll move out tonight. I don't know where I'll go, but if I'm such a weak person, then I guess I have no place here," I hiss, turning on my heel as he starts to protest. Unfortunately, I begin to move in the wrong direction so have to turn back to face him to try and get out. I try running, but I end up moving too damned fast for me to be able to cope with, so stumble.

Michael catches me in his arms before I impale myself on a _stupidly_ placed umbrella stand. He smirks as he steadies me, all traces of anger gone from both of us, but he doesn't let me go. My breathing quickens as I look back up into his eyes and see my reflection, an emotion mirrored in mine that is in his.

Lust.

Without quite realising how, suddenly my mouth is on his and he is kissing me passionately and I am kissing him back just as much so. His arms lock around my back as mine worm their way into his golden hair, pulling his head down to my level so that it's easier for me to kiss him. Instinct takes over as I lose control of my thoughts and simply press myself into him.

His tongue snakes into my mouth and I moan slightly as he kisses me further, before I push him back (somehow) so that he is on the sofa and I'm on top of him.

My hand slips down instinctively, as I don't really process what I'm doing besides to note how much enjoyment it gives me, when he pulls away with an amused expression. As soon as his lips are gone from mine I realise what I've just been doing, and wanted to do. _I have been kissing Michael, the ex-boyfriend of my ex-best friend._

Shit.

I look at him in a confused manner, not entirely sure what I've just been doing. Then it hits me and embarrassment takes over – I cannot _believe_ what I wanted to do with him; I lost all control of my body.

"Claire, wait!" he calls as I wrench myself away from him and dart down the stairs. Shit! I forgot to press the button. Yet he must realise how much I want to get away from this horrible situation, so he releases me before chasing me down the stairs.

I can't go in my room, for the memory of what has happened in there. I cannot go in Shane's or Eve's for what they did. I cannot go in Michael's because of what I _just_ did. The bathroom would just be weird and he can find and talk to me in the kitchen and living room.

I sigh and process my options. Amelie, Myrnin, or Shane… well, my parents as well, but they would judge me for Shane (and end up wanting to murder him) and be shocked about me being a vampire.

Well, although I have strange feelings about the choice beginning with the 19th letter of the alphabet, I can't go there yet. Amelie would be too heavy and overbearing and wanting to know every single detail at the minute, so I don't _really_ want to go there; also, Sam would remind me too much of Michael and then the problems that he and Michael have. So the only choice is my (slightly) eccentric boss, who is also my friend. Myrnin; he is the one I am going to for advice.

What the hell happened to this world?

Oh yeah, I found my boyfriend cheating on me with my best friend, tried to kill myself, ended up turning into a vampire and then tried to have sex with my best friend. Oh, and I missed about a week of work.

I have a feeling that Myrnin will be more focused on the last one. Something which I hope for _so _much.

**Whatcha think? **

**Hope you liked it!**

**People who are wondering about Shane's involvement in the story, never fear! He shall be back and making a rather **_**interesting **_**contribution to this story!**

**Please review! I'm going to Barcelona now, so I'd love your reviews!**

**Vicky xx**


	13. I Tried To Kill Myself, You Know?

**Chapter 13: **

**SOOOOO... I hope you enjoy this new chapter: I was in Spain last week, so couldn't update but here is the new chapter!**

**I don't own anything!**

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_Claire's POV:_

"We have much work to be getting on with, Claire, thanks to your episode over the past week," typically, Myrnin is more bothered about my missing work than my emotional well-being. Then again, that is what I wanted...

"Whatever," I say with a laugh, picking up one of the bottles of chemical in front of me and identifying it. All it is is hydrochloric acid - nothing interesting!

"Claire, how are you finding your new life as a vampire?" he asks me softly, prising the bottle from my hands and twisting me to look him in the face.

"Hard," I confess, revealing the inner pain inside of me. "All I can think about is the humans outside and their beating hearts. It makes me thirsty; it makes me want to run out there and kill them, damning the sun just to be able to kill them. Then my super-ego reminds me that it is in control and I feel guilty that I even _considered _running outside and killing them," I sigh, a tear escaping down my cheek as I acknowledge the conflicting emotions inside of me. So much of me, my new vampire self, wants to go out there and to kill everyone that I can so that I can drink their blood. Yet there is the huge part of me, the bit that just wants to stay being Claire, that would kill the other part if it tried to do anything like that. Both sides of me are so strong, it is like a raging battle inside of me and it doesn't even appear as if I am in pain! I don't know how Michael did it; he lived with three humans in such close proximity for so long and was _with_ a human… he must have some self control that I want so badly.

Myrnin looks thoughtful for a moment before disappearing around the corner and begins to rifle in one of his cupboards. It wouldn't take my vampire hearing to hear that – he is so loud I could hear him as a human as he tried to find something. This recognition of normality calms me somewhat but nowhere near as much as I want it to.

He returns suddenly, so quietly I could barely hear him _with_ vampire hearing, and shows me the product of his desires: some thick liquid, a cross between crimson and turquoise in colour, which moves _very slowly_ as he shakes the bottle vigorously.

"What _is_ that?" I ask, intrigued by the liquid.

"This, my little Claire, is a mixture I made for Michael in his early days of being a vampire," he says proudly, boasting being his usual forte. "Amelie recognised that he was finding it hard to be in the house with you all, so it is a mixture containing blood and various other chemicals which helped balance out the 'monster' in you… although many of us would rather I made a chemical that went the other way. Yet you have to be strong, little Claire… this will help, but it will require great willpower from you to ensure that it is as effective as it has the chance to be," he explains to me, his expression changing from wistful to grave within about three words.

I nod eagerly, keen for the chance to have something to be able to help me: I _knew_ Michael couldn't have done it all by himself! He is such a cheater… oh wait, I wasn't supposed to be thinking about him after our little, _ahem_, episode earlier.

"Thanks Myrnin, can I take some now?" I ask him, refocusing on the present to hide my blush. He doesn't seem to have noticed anything – god bless Myrnin's naivety – and simply nods.

"Of course, it is much more effective if you take it with some blood," he comments idly and I shrug.

"Whatever… my throat hurts – can I take a lozenge or something to help it out a bit or won't it work now that I'm a vampire?" I ask him as I follow him through to the kitchen for him to warm me some blood. I massage the outside of my aching throat, watching in confusion as he turns to look at me with an amused expression before bursting out into raucous of laughter.

"Claire… the burning in your throat is because you are _thirsty_," he clarifies, as if he is talking to a small child. "Although I cannot see why you are thirsty already… after all, you only completed the change a few hours ago. Have you done anything particularly energetic in the time between then and now?" he asks me, and I bite my lip.

"Nope," I pop the 'p' and feel instantly guilty. _Besides from kissing the pants off Michael… _"Well, I _have_ been trying to fight this urge to go outside and murder everyone in my reach," I acknowledge an originally small part of my soul, one that is clamouring for more attention, in a way to tell the truth but not reveal what I did.

He stares at me intently, an expression in his eyes as he stares into my own which I cannot read. His expression remains worried and probing but, finally, he accepts this as the truth and nods with a small smile. Then he turns back to the microwave and removes the bottle of blood from within it before pouring a little of the mixture in and handing it to me.

I cannot control my primal instincts which make me rip the bottle of blood from his hands and have it pouring down my throat. My fangs instantly slide down without me even thinking about it, tearing two holes in the bottle which causes the thick substance to flow out over my hands even as I tilt the bottle higher to try and prevent this. The entire room and everything – and anyone – in it is blocked out as I focus on the blood oozing down my throat, numbing the atrocious pain that I felt but couldn't put into words before. No, this is truly heaven… yet I _do_ feel more clarity coming back, more control of Claire, which is strange since I am doing the thing that the 'good me' doesn't want to happen. It is confusing but it works, since as I put the empty bottle of blood down, I feel so much more in control.

"Better?" Myrnin queries quietly as I wash my hands in the sink without looking at him.

"Loads, thanks Myrnin," I reply in the same tone, realising that the urge to rush outside and kill everyone – and everything – in my path has faded away to almost nothing. If I lost control of myself for a moment it would probably come back, but for now I can be relaxed and myself.

"Then do you want to tell me why you _really_ lost all that blood from your system?" he looks at me sternly, indicating how he smelt a rat in my explanation before. Shit.

"I came here because I _didn't _want to talk about that," I try to get out of telling him as we walk through back to the main lab area.

"Tough; you're here and now I _know_ for a fact that there is something else so tell me!" he smiles, proud that he tricked me into confirming that there is something else wrong with me rather than having to struggle to stop myself killing humans.

I sigh and lower myself into his reading chair – the comfiest chair in the place; if I'm going to hell, (having to tell him) I may as well do it in comfort! He raises an eyebrow at my seating choice, frowning slightly as I tuck my leg under my body, but settles on one of the lab stools, anxious and keen to hear my story.

"I'm confused, Myrnin," I confess, looking at the floor. I can't bear to look at him: if he laughs, then that would hurt me even more, but if he looks worried or concerned for me, then that could hurt even more than him laughing because I don't _want_ sympathy – I want to be able to control my own life! Yet that isn't possible for me anymore, ever since Michael and Amelie made the executive decision (with _my_ life) to turn me into a vampire forever.

"I'm not paying you to inform me that you are confused, so skip to the interesting and useful part," he says snappily; well I guess _someone_ didn't take his meds today!

"I have so many emotions conflicting with each other and so many are for the same people," I try to explain the complexity of my situation but fail miserably. "I mean, a part of me hates Amelie and Michael for turning me into this when I didn't ever _want_ to be a vampire, but a huge part of me loves Michael… I don't know why, but I seem to connect with him and enjoy his company. Then there's Shane, who I still love to pieces but I hate him as well for what he and Eve did to me and Michael… and there's Michael back again. Just before I came here, I went up to the secret room with him to explain why I tried to kill myself and then I ended up kissing him and he was kissing me back and, oh Myrnin, I haven't a clue what I feel or who I feel these feelings for!" I ramble on and on, looking up midway through and seeing a calculating face. That is neither of the faces what I expected to see, so that is a happy point in an unhappy speech.

Silence engulfs the room for the next age, making me want to cringe and start babbling even more. I manage to stop myself, however, as I would probably end up revealing in the midst of it how I used to have a crush on my hot vampire scientist boss which would be something I would _never_ live down from him. since I now have to live forever (unless I actually manage to commit suicide, in a much easier way this time) with him in close proximity, something of such a sensitive nature should not be revealed to him.

"I tried to kill myself, you know," he says quietly, almost pondering the thought. The abruptness and _irrelevance _of it hits me, making me angry for a second that he doesn't seem to care about my problems until the guilt takes over. Just because I'm a vampire doesn't mean that I have to relinquish all manners and control over being a _good person_.

"When?" I ask, through unmoving lips. After all, it's pretty shocking to hear that someone tried to kill themselves, no matter how long ago.

"I forget the date: it was when I was still human, of course," he shrugs, as if killing himself (or attempting to) is no biggie. "I believe it must have been a few days before Amelie turned me, since I suffered the excruciating pain of the poison for a long time before she decided to risk turning me."

"Why did you try and kill yourself?" I inquire softly, not wanting to be tactless and jump in and take the bull by its horns, so to speak.

"There was a young lady, who I was rather partial to," he says: of course, it was about a girl. When is suicide _ever_ about anything else other than a member of the opposite sex? Well… not counting terminal illness in there or anything. "She thought I rather queer – not a homosexual, Claire, _really_ – because I was already showing the early signs of the madness I inherited from my Father. I lost my temper quickly and had to be methodical about everything I did. But, yes, the story was that she rejected me so I decided to find the longest and most excruciating way to die so that she could possibly come and realise that she had made a mistake," he sighs softly, remembering the times from long ago.

"Did she?" I ask, thinking I already know the answer to this one.

"I don't know; I drifted in and out of consciousness for a long time – you should have to ask Amelie. She was there the entire time with me. She debated and debated over and over with herself as to whether she should indulge me in my request from the year before – to join her race and be her friend forever. When I was nearly gone, she acted and made her decision to turn me and, voila, you have me as your teacher," he grins at me, in a normal way, and I relax as I know the story is over. We are back in the present and he doesn't seem to be harbouring any feelings of pain over his suicide attempt. Then again, if he did, he has had over 900 years to get over it!

"Was there a point to that story Myrnin, or were you just trying to cheer me up in one of your strange ways?" I ask dryly, knowing that it could just as well be the second one as the first.

"Oh, there was no point; I simply felt as if I ought to divulge my brain a little walk down memory lane," he says – I knew it!

"Then if it was to make me feel better, it sort of failed," I reply in the same tone as before, smiling slightly which breaks the way I was aiming to look.

"My advice to you, little Claire, is to follow your heart," he recommends, turning to look at me deeply. "It does not matter if it takes you to an unconventional place or if you have to do something to make you realise that you want to go the other way. Don't think about what you do – much -, rather take the first idea out of your head and pursue it to the end of its course. You may be surprised by the result," he continues, explaining his meaning.

Suddenly, I know where I want to be going. I know what my first stage should be in sorting out the mess which I call my life.

"Thanks for everything, Myrnin," I say, standing up and racing towards the portal. It is amazing how fast I can move; it seems to be the only part of being a vampire that I have found is semi-ok so far.

"I shall not be paying you for this visit today, Claire," he calls after me as I disappear through the portal. I wave a hand at him behind my back before slamming the door shut, reappearing in a flat in which I have been only once or twice before, when Michael and I came to visit Sam.

"Claire, what are you doing here?" a voice calls from behind me, making my knees go shaky. I guess I know that I have to do this now, don't I?

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**So, tell me what you think?**

**Poor Myrnin!**

**Review! Here, I will make you a deal... we're on 140 reviews so far, so if I get 10 on this chapter, the 10 reviewers will go into a draw... the winner of the draw will be informed on the next chapter (so non-account holders can also enter) and they can have the chance for me to write a oneshot of their choice. Sound good?**

**Vicky xx**


	14. Visits And Decisions

**Chapter 14:**

**Musical inspiration:**

**Teenage Dream album, by Katy Perry**

**Hands album, by Little Boots**

**It's not me, it's you album, by Lily Allen.**

**COMPETITION WINNER IS... katieeblaah! congrats! you have the chance in your review this chapter to request a oneshot of any pairing, any scenario, and I will write it for you!**

**BITE CLUB IS AWESOME! Seriously, it rocks! I've written/ am writing, a tonne of oneshot fics on it, so when you've read it, please check them out xD**

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_Claire's POV:_

I take a deep breath and turn to face my ex-lover, Shane Collins who is looking at me with a confused as well as bemused expression.

"What am I doing here?" I repeat his question, my brow furrowing as I consider the answer myself. "Erm… I don't know, to be honest. I just took the portal and let my heart lead the way," I shrug, turning to look him fully in the face for the first time. His warm brown eyes meet my own and it takes all my concentration _not_ to reach over and kiss him – I need to remain detached, in order for me to be able to see just where my heart truly lies. At the moment, I don't know: it could be with Shane, Michael or even Myrnin, for all I know – Richard _Morrell_ could even be in there… I don't have a clue.

"So your heart brought you to me?" he confirms gently, taking a step closer to me. As he does, I see a flash of revulsion flash over his face as he processes my new state as a vampire, but he manages to hide it. "You look pretty much the same as… before. Are you alright?" he seems pretty concerned for me, and my heart swells out at this.

"I'm not going to bite you, if that's what you mean," I say, venom in my voice as I realise just _how_ easily I get angry now. How the hell Michael managed to ensure that he kept his temper when Shane was continually riling him, I don't know… ok, _stop thinking about Michael!_ "Look, I'm sorry… I'm just confused and I don't know how to be… I can't control myself properly yet and I _don't know what to do_!" I burst out, a tear escaping down my cheek.

He moves closer and hesitates a second before encasing me in a huge hug. The reminder of his smell overwhelms me and I relax into him entirely, placing my head on his shoulder and just crying out the pain from everything that has happened: him and Eve cheating together, the suicide, the turning into a vampire, then kissing Michael… everything just seems backwards! It's as if I'm in a dream, no a nightmare, that I cannot escape from no matter how hard I try. I am locked into this pain, this horrific feeling of desolation and lack of knowledge of what to do, forever until I know what to do to get out of it.

Well… I _know_ what I have to do: I have to find which path my heart wishes to take and then follow that in order to escape the pain engulfing my body. I need answers – and fast.

"Follow where you want to go," Shane whispers into my hair as he pulls me closer to him. I'm afraid to use any strength in the hug incase I hurt him but he isn't careful with me – no matter how hard he pulls me into him, I cannot be hurt – not by a mere human without a stake, at least. "I love you, Claire. I always have and I always will… I am so sorry for what I did… it was so wrong and you have every right to never forgive me. Just remember that I will continue fighting for you forever," he says, and I can hear the tears dripping down his face as if they were on a cd which was playing at full blast. These heightened senses are doing _nothing_ but confusing me! I don't know what to do or what I even truly feel, because I know _exactly what Shane is feeling!_ It's like I have suddenly gotten these psychic powers because I can tell that Shane wants to kiss me, to hug me closer to him forever, for me to forgive him… it's twisting what I want to do…

But then there is the lust – not the lust for Shane but for his blood. It makes me thirsty, just thinking about the loud heartbeat in his chest, the strong and muscular heart which is pumping thick _delicious_ blood around his body… blood which could fill my mouth and make me feel the satisfactory feeling the blood gives me, the pleasure, the _desirable_ sensation of happiness.

NO!

I'm not going to drink from Shane… so much of me still loves him; to hurt him would be to hurt myself. I cannot drink from him – but what can I do in order to distract myself from his blood? My fangs are already sinking down in preparation although he cannot see, so what should I do?

Part of my heart gives me the answer, the motion which I should complete. So I do it: I force the fangs back up entirely, so they are nonexistent once again, and lift my tearstained head up to face him. Then I reach up, wrapping my arms around his neck as gently as possible, and press my lips to his. The rush of pleasure is instantaneous as the pressure he exerts (after a second of shock) increases as he kisses me back as hard as possible.

Part of me enjoys it, but the other part – the dominant part – thinks why the hell am I doing this? After all, he cheated on me – I shouldn't forgive him _ever_ much less be _kissing_ him… but I continue to kiss him because it is truly enjoyable… until the blood is back at the forefront of my mind. Soon, this is all I can think about; I can only imagine sinking my fangs into his neck, ensuring that the blood drains into my mouth and down my throat, quenching the already building fire… oh god, I cannot do this.

With all the strength I have, I wrench myself off of him and move to the other side of the room, hoping that this will make me less likely to attack him. It doesn't make a difference – his unique and human scent is all over the flat and it makes me want him even more… no, not in a loving way, but simply for his blood.

It strikes me now that the kiss didn't share any pleasure with me or my heart, it simply reinforces the pleasure, the fireworks, I felt when I kissed Michael.

"Claire?" Shane's voice brings me back to the reality I am in – a room with him in it. Just this makes me _so_ angry I kissed him, and the memory that he _cheated on me with my best friend_ returns with a vengeance. It is all I can do not to drink his blood – but for a different reason than lust – so I turn away.

"I can't stay – this was a mistake," I say with the last of the breath in my body – to breathe anymore in his presence would render me unable to control myself and I would attack. So I walk towards the portal until his hand shoots out and grabs my arm. I could wrench him off but I wait, not turning to look at him because I fear the anger would show on my face.

"So you're just going to leave?" he confirms and I nod mutely, staring at one of the cracked floor tiles to try and alleviate my anger through boredom. "You kiss me and then leave? Let me guess, my blood is too much for you! Well, glad to see you're a typical vampire! look, have some of the stuff you crave so damned much!" he explodes, lifting his hand from my arm as if it burns to be touching someone so cold and hard. The arm lifts to his mouth and he begins to bite, trying to get the blood to release…

"STOP!" I yell at him, wrenching the hand from his mouth so that the blood doesn't come free. There is _no way_ I could resist that. I have to breathe, but it doesn't hurt as much as I thought it would – not when I know that I don't need to be with Shane… I am going to be with Michael. Shane stares at me from the floor, a look of bitter anger in his eyes. "Let us get this straight. This was entirely a mistake – I didn't know what I wanted so I came here to find out. Well let me tell you, _I don't want a cheating bastard_! I was wrong to even consider that – so we are entirely over with no chance of getting back together. Do you understand that?" I confirm with him, watching as his expression turns darker and darker.

"I know I don't want to be with a bloodsucking vampire, yeah," he childishly says, his face twisting up even further. I don't know why I was ever with him – he isn't 'handsome' when he looks like that, and he looks like that most of the time. "Go, Claire, and run home to your little vampire lover who is just waiting for you to go suck blood together!" He childishly exclaims before turning away from me.

"Fine, be a childish and immature prick," I snort before walking back through the portal. Then something hits me as I arrive: I could have _sworn _that I was thinking of the Glass House and not where I am now.

"Hello, Claire," Amelie greets me coolly as I enter her office properly. "I think it's time we had a chat, don't you?" and something about her tone tells me I probably won't like what I'm going to hear...

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**So please review! Pwiddy pwease, with a cherry on top... I will even update faster if some people read other stories as well, help get their review quotas up *cough Devil's Lair***

**If I get to 169 reviews this chapter, I will run the competition again! Hope you all enter it by reviewing! It is definitely possible!**

**Vicky xx**


	15. Speak When Spoken To

**Chapter 15: **

**So, sorry for the long update: it was _all_ Hanziii's fault, as she needed to read something of mine first before I posted this new chapter!**

**Competition winner is...vamps! Review and claim your oneshot!**

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_Claire's POV:_

I sit down carefully in one of the chairs in front of Amelie, worried for what she could want me for. It's quite scary, and for a second I panic that Myrnin told her what I said about hating her because she and Michael changed me into a vampire. then I realise that he wouldn't be that stupid because if he told her that, then she would probably kill him – the shooting the messenger saying is a saying for a reason!

"Um… what is it?" I ask slowly, breaking the tense silence. I know I would have been babbling away like a lunatic about _everything_ in my life, including how we all once wondered what underwear she wears, if I didn't end up sounding impertinent and asking why she summoned me here.

"You realise that I intercepted your control of the portals to bring you here?" she confirms with me – _that's_ why I didn't return home. Trust Amelie… I was just about to confess my feelings to Michael on the spur of the moment and she has to jump into that time, leaving time for seeds of doubt to be sown in my mind. "Good… I am glad that you are not _entirely_ stupid," she says sharply, which confuses me… I didn't realise that she thought I was stupid when, hello, _she was saving my life_! I don't see how that works.

"I, erm… well, yeah," I say, stopping when she looks at me with daggers in her eyes (which are directed at me) because I guess I wasn't supposed to speak.

"When I want you to speak, Claire, I shall say," she snaps at me, confusing me even further. Jeez, what is her problem? If this is because she and Sam have had an argument, I shall be attempting to kill the pair of them! Speaking of Sam, I need to thank him for what he did for me before… "I smell _that boy_ on you – am I going crazy or have you just been to visit him?" she asks me coolly, and I realise that this time she _does_ want an answer.

"I, erm, was confused and I needed to sort out everything in my head so, yeah, I visited him," I reply slowly and in a quiet voice so perhaps she won't hear. Fat chance of that, what with her immense age and all.

"So the boy who caused all of this to happen just happened to be your first stop on the help ladder?" Amelie says, shaking her head in disbelief.

"Actually, I went to see Myrnin first," I argue back, before shrinking back in my chair as the look she gives me would have stopped my heart itself if I were human. Jeez… I _know_ she has the fear factor; she doesn't need to flash it in my face every five seconds.

"I see… so let me confirm, you decided to go to Shane Collins and then you kiss him?" she sounds as if she cannot believe my actions, and I rub at my lips – surely it cannot be _that_ obvious that I have just been kissing, no? If it is, I guess it is a good thing that I didn't go straight home – Michael would be able to tell that I had been kissing Shane, with his scent all over me. "Oh Claire, is he alive?" she sighs, looking at me with actual concern in her eyes. It is as if the anger has simply gone 'poof' because she is worrying that I have killed someone, even though I never wanted to kill anyone ever.

"Of course he is alive!" I reply, indignated that she could think so little of me that I would kill someone. "Amelie, I may be young, but I don't have _that_ little self control that I cannot stop myself killing someone when I kiss them! I managed…" I cut off then, not wanting to tell the 'girlfriend' (such a colloquial term with Amelie… I mean, its _Amelie…_when would you consider calling _her_ someone's girlfriend?) of the guy involved's Grandad about kissing him.

Her left eyebrow rises and I know she hasn't missed my stopped sentence. "Well, Claire? I have to say, you are getting into a most vulgar habit of speaking your mind and then stopping yourself before you finish the thought. At least _think_ before you speak… or act. That could be the more beneficial choice for you," she returns to cool and snappy by the end as she continues to lecture me.

"Really, it isn't anything… please," I beg and she relaxes slightly.

"Very well, I already have an idea of what it is, especially when Michael came bursting in here looking for you," she says sharply, and I blush deeply. She knows what is going on… that is just great. "And whilst I may not condone your behaviour, Claire, I am more worried about your bloodlust and how you have come very close to killing someone because you gave in to your desires."

"But _I didn't kill anyone_," I stress, anger rising in me. She is just so _negative_, as if she cannot believe that someone could manage not to be a monster straight away! Michael and Sam did it! It isn't like I'm some weird and special case of being normal – I just can control myself.

"I know you didn't kill anyone, Claire," she snaps back at me, and there is a chilly sensation in the room. She is asserting her power and authority in the room, and it makes the spark of anger in me subside to nothing, as my power registers as entirely non-existent compared to hers. "However, I can see in your face and body how hard it was for you to stop yourself. You are not superwoman – if you will remember, Michael left with me and Sam when he turned, and he was away from humans for twenty four hours. No matter how much control you have, it is _extremely_ hard to stop yourself from killing within the first day," she says slowly, obviously contemplating how I managed to stop myself.

She can see how hard it was for me not to kill Shane – either it is very obvious or she is good at reading my body language… something is telling me that it is the first choice. But the fact that I _didn't_ kill Shane is concerning me – if I was supposed to, how come I didn't?

"Amelie… will I become me again?" I question her, my voice quavering.

"Come again?" she asks, obviously confused as to my question and it's meaning. As to her, I am already myself again – I am alive and talking and such… it takes a lot to confuse Amelie, but this is no victory here.

"I am just _so angry_ – it takes absolutely _nothing_ to spark the anger!" I burst out with, barely containing the tears. "It's as if every emotion I feel is intensified and I become _consumed_ by that emotion when it is in dominance. I felt as if I was going deaf when the noise of a _tear_ in Shane's eye came to my ears because it was so loud… it is just so confusing, so hard… I don't know what to do, Amelie, or how to be. And that really scares me," I am whispering by the end and tears explode out of me. I cannot do anything to contain them and they simply keep coming out and out.

Amelie moves around awkwardly to comfort me, resting her hand lightly on my shoulder in a 'helpful' motion, but it doesn't really work. I just keep bawling for a good ten minutes before the tears finally slow. She leans backwards, keen to be able to escape the tenderness she exhibited for all of about three seconds, and onto the desk, her cream dress – stage up from suits in the fashion stages – ruffled behind her.

"You will calm down into a state of… normality," she says finally, her grey eyes piercing my own brown ones right to the core. "I cannot guarantee when, but normally it isn't more than approximately a week or so especially in close contact with, ahem, people who are dear to your heart. Usually they help to ensure that you return to being yourself, although it can be rather embarrassing when you come around and realise just how your actions made you seem," she smiles, but I guess it isn't from _her_ experience (Bishop turned her and she didn't have anyone, I don't think) rather Sam's… oh, I _really_ don't want to be thinking about that. That is something that I wish had _never_ entered my head, but it has so…

"Oh," I say simply and she laughs a tinkling laugh I would never have expected to hear from her.

"Yes, that is the correct sentiment," she says with a warmness in her voice I have rarely heard before. "Go, Claire. I will require to speak with you in a couple of days, once you are yourself again, but go and spend time with Michael," she instructs me, and the blush rises over me again as I realise what she said – spend time with Michael. That basically means… EW! I don't want to be thinking about _her_ thinking about me and Michael… that's just _wrong_!

"Ok, bye!" I exclaim and rush out of the office through the portal as quickly as possible, keen to get out of that situation. I breathe in the luscious scent of the Glass House living room as I bowl into it at full speed, but don't crash into anything because I can see the sofa directly in front of me – I simply bypass it and come to a halt near instantly.

I turn around and look for Michael, before deciding that it is probably easier to 'sense' if he is home or not. I close my eyes and extend my sensitive ears around the house, ignoring the whirring of the fridge and the beeping of the cooker as I listen for signs of life. I hear nothing, and I both relax and want to cry at the same time. I relax because it means I have a little longer on my own without having to worry or whatever, but I cry because it means I have to wait longer to see my Michael, the angel, and I worry that I will chicken out.

But this is a perfect time, if he isn't home, for me to get a shower and rinse off Shane's scent from me, meaning that Michael will never need to know I left here and went to snog my ex-boyfriend, who cheated on me. That's not exactly the type of person I would consider myself to be.

I race up the stairs, wobbling slightly as I move so fast and remain disorientated, and head into the bathroom, not bothering to take clothes with me because now there is only me and Michael, the person I _think_ I love, in the household. And the house is empty, bar me, at the minute, so it is fine.

In the bathroom, I strip off the clothes and put them to the bottom of the washbasket where clothes remain from when Shane and I were together (was that really only a week or so ago?) before stepping into the shower and scrubbing. I dig my nails into my scalp as I wash my hair, wanting to get out every single bit of Shane that is on me – I hate what I did. I let my stupid emotions get the better of me when I am quite _obviously_ unstable at the minute, and this is the result – intense guilt for what I did. The water irritates my ears as the sound of it coming out of the shower head and then hitting the bottom of the bath comes into my ears as if fifteen diggers at a construction site were all in action at the same time… but that pain is worth getting rid of the evidence of my stupidity.

Once washed and such, I step out of the shower and wrap myself in one of the thick and fluffy towels on the side. Then I walk through from the bathroom and bump into a figure loitering outside of the door. This figure has blond hair in a pretty damned awesome style and is wearing tight fitting jeans with a superdry t-shirt which fits to his muscles like perfection.

"Hey," I whisper into his chest as I bump into it, not moving myself. "We need to talk," I tell him, lifting my head to look into his sky blue eyes with a smile. This smile seems to reassure him slightly and I notice how his attention goes from my body to my face as he waits for me to continue to talk. "Two minutes and I'll be ready."

"Where?" he asks, as I pull away, realising that his hand is on my arm and absentmindedly pulling me closer to him. I think about this for a moment before responding.

"Your room," I shrug, deciding that this is the only logical place left. All remnants of Eve (besides her scent… but I doubt I will be able to smell that quite so strongly, since she hasn't been in that room for like a week or more… more, actually, since I doubt Michael was still sleeping with her just to keep up pretences for me) are gone in there, and it is a nice room. "See ya in a min, Michael."

With that, I walk into my room and begin to dress quickly, wondering _just_ what we're going to be saying…

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**So… if I was nice, I would have put that in the same chapter, but I have a feeling that it could end up being **_**quite**_**long… therefore, it wouldn't be an exactly riveting chapter, would it? And it is pretty sucky, so I didn't want to ruin the okayness of this chappy...**

**Please review… 9 reviews and I run the competition again!**

**Vicky xx**


	16. Jump

**Chapter 16:**

**So… thanks to all you amazing people who review!**

**Contest winner is...Nightworld Seeker! Review & tell me the oneshot you want me to write!**

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_Claire's POV:_

Instinct. That's what, when you have no idea _what_ to do, drives you forwards into the wilderness which is life. It is what gets you to places which you may otherwise not have gone… for instance, if I hadn't have had the instinct to kiss Shane, I wouldn't know now that I belong with Michael…

And if I didn't have instinct now, I would still be fretting in my room about what is going to go on now.

So, rather than fret, I decide to let instinct guide me in the path of what to do, rather than my brain, so find myself knocking on Michael's door within three seconds of deciding this.

"Claire, you don't have to knock," he says through the door so I push it open. Instantly, the smell of Michael, the unmistakeable odour which clings to him and that I could smell even as a human, hits me and I am almost overwhelmed by it. But I manage to continue walking into the room as if it didn't affect me whatsoever. "Claire, you've just walked into the chair," Michael says, amused as I crash into the rocking chair right in front of me. Damn, missed that in my haste to appear all calm and normal instead of the churning mess my insides are.

"Yes, yes you are right, I _have_ just walked into the chair," I say, with a nervous tinkling approximation of a laugh. It sounds so odd and false even to my own ears… shit. That isn't what I wanted to appear like…

He is suddenly standing next to me, pulling me round by the shoulders to face him. He looks concerned for me, his blue eyes clouded over with indecision, with pain, with something which I _just_ can't read. I hate being in the dark – I truly do – so why can I not tell what it is? Urgh!

"What's up?" he asks me, very calmly, his voice like a pentameter, slow and steady. I take a deep breath and shake slightly so he leads me over to his bed and sets me down, sitting on the other side of me. He takes one of my hands and plays with it, distracting me entirely from the limited thought process I already had going…

"I can't explain _any_ of this, at least not without sounding like I am this crazy idiot," I sigh, wondering just how to explain what I want to say. "And it will probably take me like fifty million years, so I'd be prepared to wait," I continue and he laughs very slightly.

"Then I hope you don't mind if you let me go first," he suggests and I nod, keen for him to reveal what he wants to before then that allowing me to be able to possibly adapt what I am _thinking _of saying if it isn't going to fit in with what he says. "Look, Claire, this probably sounds really strange especially since everything only really came to a head today, but… I think I love you. I'm absolutely sure that this isn't a rebound because, well, it's been a long time coming, I think. I can't say for definite that my feelings would have matured if everything that… happened didn't happen, but I know that it is the truth," he says, shocking the breath right out of me. Whatever I expected, I'm sure it wasn't a full fledged confession of love for me!

"Um…" I trail off, not sure exactly what to say. It's sort of what I was going to say but not really, because I can't say that I love him, not yet. I just don't know what to say… what can I do?

So I don't say anything… I turn my body around so I am facing him entirely and lean over to press my lips softly to his. It's an explosion of emotions – lust, desire, love… so much of these _happy_ emotions. It makes me kiss him even harder, wrapping my arms around his neck as he pulls me closer to his body, pushing our hips together. He doesn't seem to want to push me away – hello, sort of fitting with what he just _said_ – and instead kisses me back, harder than even I am kissing him.

I half jump and wrap my legs around his body as his tongue enters my mouth, my breathing increasing even though it doesn't need to because I don't need to breathe as much as a vampire. However, I've been vamp for less than a day, so sue me for still behaving as a human.

I wrench my mouth from his and rest my forehead against his chest, his laboured breathing matching my own.

"Wow… just wow," he whispers into my hair, his lips pressing against the brown locks softly. I grin as he does this, unable to help myself, and half laugh for some strange reason. The urges… they're overwhelming. I feel so many emotions, it's unreal, but so much lust for Michael – I want him _now_.

"I think you can sort of tell what I was going to say," I speak into his chest, my mouth resting on his form fitting t-shirt but all the while wishing it was attached to his lips again.

"I think you covered it pretty well," he agrees, laughing and wrapping his fingers into my hair. I lift my head and look him in the eyes, seeing only love and the want for me. "I know what you're feeling right now, Claire, and I... I hope you'll feel the same way next week, when you're back to normal," he sighs, evidently worried that this is just the reaction of a newly turned vampire, and not actually me.

I can see his point – I personally think it's a bit of both. I _know_ I do have feelings for him but I also know that the lust and such is driving me on to do things that I wouldn't normally do or feel comfortable doing. No… honestly, I can't say whether or not it is the vampire state or not.

"Tell you what, kiss me and I'll show you the answer," I grin but he shakes his head, almost making me feel rejected. He lifts me up into his arms and holds me close to him, almost babylike, before standing up and taking me down the stairs. He moves through to the kitchen with me and sets me down at the table, kissing my nose softly, teasing me.

"What do you want to eat for our first date?" he questions me, evidently trying to keep the lust from overtaking me again, like it did in the secret room, so that he can tell whether or not I do have feelings for him.

"Look, Michael, I'm being serious here… I know that the way I'm now a vampire means that I have all these emotion swings, but I know that I do feel something for you," I say honestly to him, locking myself into his sky blue eyes. "But I think that I want some of your world famous pizza for dinner, what do you think?" I raise my eyebrows suggestively and he laughs, pulling me by the shoulder into his chest.

I sigh as we sit like this for a long moment, able to keep the emotions under check – perhaps the tonic Myrnin gave me is _finally_ kicking in.

"So, about this tonic that Myrnin has," I say conversationally and he laughs, slightly embarrassed. "I _knew_ you couldn't have-" I begin before his lips meet mine once again to quieten me.

"Shut up," he whispers against my lips as he releases me for a moment. Then he presses his lips to mine again, sending a rush of exhilaration through me. I think I could get used to this!

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**Ok… I would REALLY like to apologise for the quality of this chapter. For me, this writing is absolutely appalling & I am so sorry that it sucked; I rewrote this chapter so many times throughout the last two weeks, but it JUST WON'T WORK!**

**But I swear, the next chapter is better.**

**:/ sorry guys.**

**May not be able to update for a while, since my exams start in the next few days :(**

**Vicky xx**


	17. Careful, Little Girlie

**Chapter 17:**

**So… this is the chapter which makes up for the disappointing last one!**

**Enjoy!**

**This is for Hanzii, the most wonderful person ever haha... well... she made me write that (JK) but tell her to read faster to make the update go up quicker!**

**I don't own anything!**

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_Claire's POV – one week later:_

Yes! I finally feel like me again! Seriously, it's _so_ great to not have these _urges_ all the time; for a week I have just wanted to sleep with Michael _all_ the time, or kiss him, or kill something… it's like I'm a fridge freezer – when you move it, you have to leave it turned off for a while for the gases to settle but as soon as they have, it's back to normal duty for it.

"I cannot _believe_ I did that!" I groan, tilting my head back into Michael's lap. He laughs and strokes my hair softly, bending over to kiss my forehead in the same manner.

"Well believe it, honey, as you did," he grins as I look up at him. I cannot even _get_ into how disgusted I feel about behaving like such a… sexual _predator_! Seriously, it's disgusting and disturbing and I feel as if I want to crawl into a hole and die! Or at least hide from Michael for a million years until he forgets… which I doubt he will. He'll enjoy this power over me of knowledge of how I behaved… we may be together, but he will still tease me.

"Don't remind me of it _ever_ again, ok?" I ask him quietly, looking up at him. I look deep into his sky blue eyes and feel as if I am drowning in the sky, unable to get out of his gaze. If I had still been human, I'd have… I need to stop thinking 'if I were human' and get into thinking about how I am a vampire now and need to move on with my life.

"I guess… at least for a few months, so it's faded from your own mind," he torments me even further by assuring me that he is going to bring it up again some time in the future. "But _now_, well, you don't have to go to work for another fifteen minutes or so, do you?" he whispers into my ear, making me lift my head and angle it slightly to kiss him softly on the lips.

My back arches as he pulls my head closer to him, cupping the bottom of it with his hands, his fingers stroking my chin softly. I smile as he kisses me even more until…

"Well, I didn't know that _that_ was possible," Myrnin smirks, suddenly appearing in the doorway (portalway) and staring at us. I start upright, landing with a thud in Michael's lap, my hand over my immobile heart in a reaction I will never cease to have.

"Jeez, Myrnin, you scared me!" I say, my brow furrowing as I look over at Myrnin who is leaning against the wall, his arms crossed. "Wait… what are you _doing_ here?" I ask, wondering what possible reason he could have in order to be in our house right now.

"No reason, simply wondered if you were ready to return to work _now_ rather than, oh, _fifteen minutes ago_!" he snaps – great, he's unhappy. But wait… what time is it?

I glance around the room to find the clock and _shit_, I'm late! No wonder he is here – I was supposed to be there fifteen minutes ago… I'm late! He always seems as if he is going to kill me if I'm a minute late, let alone fifteen minutes!

"Myrnin, erm, I got distracted?" I come up with an excuse but he simply laughs and shrugs his shoulders.

"Whatever, take the day off, I don't need you," he says – wow. What happened to Mr Controlling? Or will I just never hear the end of how I missed a day of work for the rest of time?

"Are you sure?" I confirm and he nods, already walking through the portal and locking it behind him: I can hear the slamming of his locks on the other side. Sheesh, I think he is in a little of a mood, but I don't care because he gave me the day off, so he can't exactly complain now, can he?

"Well… what do you want to do?" I ask Michael, who grins. I lean back against his chest and just relax, knowing that I am happy and able to just be me.

"Well, we could go out for the first time together?" he suggests, a smile on his face at just the idea of being able to say that we are together: it sounds pretty awesome!

"How about you treat me to a coffee in Common Grounds?" I say, already shifting in order to be able to stand up in one fluid movement.

"That sounds absolutely perfect," he grins, and when he does, it makes my heart just about explode. He is so utterly amazing – just why he wants to be with me is beyond anything I could ever think of, but he is so I need to stop disputing it with myself.

So we walk towards the door before realising that it is daytime and we can't go out – well, Michael has built up a _little_ resistance to the sun but I am a new vampire and sunlight could really hurt right now. So I can't go out through that way… so how are we going to get out?

"Can we, like, use the portals?" Michael suggests – wow, great idea! I hated using them before as a human because I was always scared it could addle with my brainwaves and leave me a vegetable, if I used them too much. But Amelie, Myrnin and Oliver use them all the time, so I don't think that they can be particularly dangerous (if at all) to vampires.

"Brilliant idea, Michael," I smile as he takes my hand and kisses the side of my neck softly, making me laugh as he does so. It feels so _liberating_ to be myself again, after being such a sex obsessed monster (who also craved blood incessantly) for about a week. It is just so _embarrassing_ to think that _I, _goody two shoes, Claire, behaved in such a vile and repulsive manner for such a long time. Even thinking that other vampires behaved the same way doesn't exactly help me – it only makes me realise that they know _exactly_ what I wanted in that time!

"With you being such a worryguts, I'm guessing that you're thinking about what people will think of you: humans wondering why you are a vampire and vampires for knowing how you feel," Michael summarises my feelings perfectly, pulling me into his arms rather than opening the slightly battered door which has appeared as being the portal.

"It's just so _strange_, you know, to have hated vampires for so long – you excepted – and now to be… to be…" I cut off, wondering just how to put this into words, and he smiles before finishing it off for me.

"To be one yourself, yeah, I get it," he whispers softly into my hair, his soft breath tickling my ear and skin softly, but mainly my ear. "I felt the same way, and Sam did as well…" he cuts off at the mention of his grandfather, giving me the feeling that he isn't particularly happy with Sam. But why, I don't know.

"That reminds me… _before_, I heard something about you and Sam meeting up for a chat when I was ok again?" I broach the subject now and feel his entire body tense up, before he pulls away slightly.

"I don't want to talk about it," he says through gritted teeth, the romantic mood entirely destroyed by his overreaction. I think I shall have to have a word with both of them to get them to sit down and have the chat they need to: I think Michael thinks that Sam pretty much abandoned him when he was a ghost (though Sam didn't _know_ Michael was a ghost) and then with the way he has pretty much rode off into the sunset with Amelie (shouldn't it be _sunrise_ with them both being vampires?) and left Michael alone, as that was what Michael wanted, before. I think that he probably wants to have a relationship with his last relative in Morganville but doesn't know how to approach it…

"You _are_ going to talk about it, Michael, with either me or Amelie, or even Sam, if that's what you prefer," I say sharply, for the first time having a little of an edge to my voice when speaking to my love. "I don't care which one, to be honest, as long as this is resolved within the next few days. As I cannot be bothered with another disagreement between _anyone_, or tension, for like the next _billion_ years, kay?" I continue.

He nods slowly and pulls me back into his arms, evidently not annoyed with me whatsoever again – just like I want it to always be! "I'm sorry I was snappy – it's just hard to know _what_ to do," he whispers into my hair, his arms wrapping themselves around the upper part of my back. "I mean, I grew up with him being a vampire and he was a really great role model – but my dad didn't like the way that he treated me so much better than he treat him; I guess it was sort of jealousy, but I didn't see it as that. I just took on his ideas about Sam, and we sort of grew apart over the years. Then now, when I _want_ to really get to know him, properly – not just playing video games in his house, he isn't here for me… it's like he doesn't want to know," his voice sounds entirely agonised, as if just doesn't know what to do, as if he is a little lost boy unable to direct where he is going in life.

"I think, honey, that the point is that you tell _Sam_ this, not just me," I console him gently, not knowing really what to say but knowing that he needs to tell Sam how he feels, not just me.

"You're right… why don't I just listen to you all the time?" he laughs, abruptly lightening the ominously heavy mood encroaching on our happy mood.

"Because if you did, you wouldn't be Michael," I respond instantly, making him muss my hair up with his hands. "Hey! It took me _time_ earlier to make this masterpiece!" I pretend to be outraged at the way that he messes my hair up, but it isn't the truth – I love it!

"Don't lie: it took you about three seconds and that was about three hours ago, _well_ before Myrnin came in," Michael retorts seriously, knowing that he has won. But he reminds me of Myrnin, my wonderful and sweet boss… who also loves having the dirt on people and _will_ be using this experience against me forever, or until something else takes the place of it.

"_Urgh_, how am I supposed to face Myrnin?" I groan as I remember back to only about, what, fifteen minutes ago when he walked in and watched us basically groping one another – just great, that this happened with my boss, who I end up spending half of the fricking day with (and now I am less reliant on sleep, I'm guessing that this going to mean my hours are upped).

"Just tell him you know what he did last summer – you know, like the film?" he suggests with a grin, before finally actually opening the portal door to reveal the office Oliver occupies at the back of Common Grounds.

"Oh my, what _have_ I done to deserve such _wonderful_ customers coming to me by my portal?" Oliver sarcastically calls as he processes our existence in the portal. "Oh, dear me, Claire has become a _vampire. _What on _earth _happened for such a travesty to occur, for the vampire hater to now _be_ a vampire?" he asks with a heavy sense of sarcasm overpowering anything else in his tone.

"A) it isn't _your_ portal," I reply coolly, putting as much anger and contempt in the glare I shoot him. "B) That isn't any of your business and I have no need to tell you, do I? Hmm, yes, the answer to that question is no, therefore I don't tell you," I continue, smiling slightly as his face turns shocked at the way that I am answering him back now I am no longer a defenceless human.

"Careful, little girlie, you may be a vampire but I am _much_ stronger than you," Oliver says in his dangerously silky smooth voice.

"Then it's good that I am here as well then, isn't it?" Michael replies, his voice hard as he pulls me closer to him. We both shoot daggers at Oliver, who looks amazed at our show of solidarity.

"Whatever," he replies childishly, waving his hand to show he doesn't want to speak to us anymore. We don't care; simply walk away and through the door to enter the café.

I have been building up in my head that everyone will stare when they see me, but I am glad to be mistaken. As we walk through, not one person looks at us as we make our way to the back, shade covered corner and sit down.

"Mocha?" Michael confirms and I nod. With this, he heads away to the counter to place our order, leaving me alone for a while. Of course, in this time, Sam would ring, wouldn't he?

"Hey, Claire, are you ok?" he asks me, a smile evident in his tone.

"Yeah, I'm great, thanks," I tell him honestly, and he laughs gently. "How are you?"

"I'm ok… I was just wondering if I could speak to Michael; he isn't answering his phone to me and we said we would have a chat sometime," he answers, pressing the button which I was going to talk to him about anyway.

"He's just at the counter at the minute – we're in Common Grounds, so if you want to come and talk to him in like twenty?" I suggest, knowing it's better for them to _meet_ in a neutral place, and then they can discuss anything else elsewhere.

"Sure, I'll be there for then!" he exclaims, sounding really happy for having the chance to speak to Michael, albeit not right now. "Thanks, Claire, for this. I'm going now, so see you soon!" he hangs up.

I put my phone away and watch as Michael pays for the drinks and waits for them by the counter. Little does he know I have arranged for him and Sam to have a little chat in 19 minutes…

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**Whatcha think?**

**Ooohh and the reason why Michael 'hates' Sam is in my fic 'Because he's a vampire'**

**Review, please!**

**Also, take a look at my co-op story, Alchemy of the Heart!**

**Vicky xx**


	18. You Did WHAT?

**Chapter 18:**

**So… this story is near the end: sad? You could be, if you like this fic as there will, unfortunately, be no sequel. Things have to end and this is one of those things!**

**Idk how much longer this will go on for… depends on like how long it takes me to wrap up some loose ends in it.**

**I don't own anything**

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_Claire's POV:_

"What do you _mean_, you asked Sam to come and see me?" Michael says through gritted teeth as we are only three minute from Sam actually coming.

"I mean exactly what I just said," I respond calmly and logically – I mean, _come on_! I've just told him what I meant so why does he need to repeat exactly what I told him? "You and Sam need to talk as, to be honest, I'm fed up of the tension," I sigh, sipping my mocha with a strange feeling in me. Perhaps it's just the knowledge that my action could either make their relationship or tear it apart so finally that it can never be repaired in the future.

His eyebrows rise at this and he looks at me with a funny expression. "Claire, _what_ tension? Since the only time I have seen Sam recently is when you were, you know, and that didn't exactly cause any major tension since you were _asleep_," he says, anger the main factor in his tone: I take it that he doesn't like the way that I sort of arranged this without his knowledge.

"You know what I mean," I bluff, realising that 'tension' wasn't the right word to use since there has been no mention of Sam in the entire time that Michael and I have been together.

"Actually, I don't think I do," he responds coldly and I can tell that he _really_ isn't happy that this meeting is going ahead.

"I mean that it isn't _right_ that you two aren't talking – I mean, you're _family_," I stress the point, placing my hand on top of his to try and get him to relax. It works: he looks more relaxed as he stares into my face and he takes a deep breath to calm down.

"We may be family but…" he trails off, evidently not having a good enough comeback to add on the end.

"But he's a vampire?" I question the most likely ending to the sentence before snorting. "Michael, I hate to break it to you honey, but _you're_ a vampire as well. I am, if that makes the slightest bit of difference. So get over the damned 'he is a vampire' card and just accept it. I should go," I drain (no pun intended) the last of my coffee before standing up.

Michael's hand shoots out to grab my arm to hold me still and I end up getting locked in his sky blue eyes.

"Stay," he asks me softly, his eyes filled with emotion: I take it he doesn't want to be alone with Sam for some strange reason. "Please Claire, stay," he pretty much begs me and my relent weakens.

"I'll sit by the counter – only if you buy me another coffee," I smile and he laughs, standing and pulling me in for a quick hug before releasing me. He hands me a $5 note and smiles at me before sitting back down, the anguished and worried expression back on his face.

"Wondering whether you did the right thing?" Oliver asks me as I walk up to him at the counter. He instantly begins to make my drink without bothering to ask for my order and I have to smile at his efficiency. "Claire, that wasn't a rhetorical question. I actually wanted an answer," he continues, slightly irately, as I stand there for a few moments without saying anything.

"Well, Mr Know-It-All, you tell me," I stare stonily at him, trying to draw on the inner vampire that loiters within me now. It is so strange to be this violent creature on the inside and to know that to loose my temper and control for _one_ second could result in my murdering someone. "After all, you could tell that I could be regretting it. What else can the psychic Oliver tell me?" I continue, mocking him as I take the coffee from him. From the corner of my eye, I can see Sam arriving in the café and moves across to Michael, who instantly stiffens.

Oliver notices my preoccupation and chuckles slightly before answering my question. "You are thinking that perhaps you shouldn't have arranged this because if anything blows up and he hates him even more, it will all be your fault," he accurately gets the _exact _way I am feeling… it's creepy. "You're probably wondering about the emotional state of the two of them and debating as to whether they'll show how they feel or if they'll hide it and then that will mean that this is never resolved," he continues, which creeps me out even more.

I turn to look at him with a disbelieving expression before snorting. "Are you sure you're not a girl?" I ask him, shaking my head in disbelief.

"_That_ is something I am _entirely_ positive about," he snaps back, the traces of nice Oliver when he was analysing what is going on disappearing faster than apparently Snape did in Harry Potter when confronted with shampoo!

"Oh," I feign surprise, continuing with this line of thought. "Well, I thought that, since you were getting into emotional stuff, you must be a girl. But as you aren't, that leaves only the option that you are gay!" I splutter and his face hardens into a line that does _nothing_ for his already pretty diabolical looks.

"If you want to continue to observe your beau and his relative, I would stay schtum!" he exclaims, slightly manically. I smile at this and nod, settling down onto one of the bar stools.

I cannot hear anything besides snippets and murmurs from them, but I can tell that Oliver can: what perks would there be of being as old as _him_ without being able to hear the fifteen metre span with ease?

"What are they saying?" I murmur to him, interrupting his utter focus on them.

"I'm not going to betray their confidences: if you want to know, ask them," he says with a vindictive smile, something which confirms my belief that his refusal to tell me is simply petty payback for me calling him a girl.

"Oh, Oliver," I say with a smile back, trying to hide how much I want to know. This is strange, being able to argue back with him without the fear of _absolute_ death – now, he is much less likely to kill one of his own kind, just… probably seriously injure. "You see, I can just go and tell everyone that you're gay. So you either give me the gist of the conversation – I don't need specifics – or I announce to all of Common Grounds that Ollypop is gay," I grin at him this time, pleased to have found an angle with which to attack him and he cannot fight back.

His eyes narrow as he tries to find a loophole or something but he knows I will do as I am saying: I think the issue from Blacke sort of showed that, with the entire shooting thing.

"Fine, all they are doing is discussing why there has been a divide between them in the past," Oliver drawls as he gives me what I want. "Sam seems as if he wants to reconcile and Michael, although he is _trying_ to appear strong and manly, doesn't seem to mind meeting this request. That enough information, little girl?" he snarls at me by the end but I don't care.

"Sure is, Ollypop," I grin as I call him by the nickname that he absolutely despises. His hand shoots out to grab my arm, like Michael's did earlier, but this feels vicious – and it _hurts_.

"Don't you _ever_ call me Ollypop again," he hisses into my ear, entirely feral in his tone. I manage to hold back a shudder as I feel the fear circulating through me: evidently I can still be scared by big, bad vamps! "Because, if you do, I will not be responsible for my actions," he continues, in the same tone.

"No probs, Ollie," I grin at him until he retains his grip on my arm – ow.

"Or _any_ deviation from my name, Oliver, _got it_?" he asks me sharply and I nod before ripping my arm from his grasp. I don't know if he released me or what, but I know that I am not going to be in grabbing distance when I call him Ollypop! "Now, did you want to know anything else from the conversation or are you just going to stand there like the idiot I know you are?" he continues, speaking in an 'evil' tone but appearing to smile – probably because there are humans in the vicinity and threatening the golden girl here (figuratively) wouldn't make him look like the hippie he pretends to be.

"Go on, tell me some more," I give into finding out more information rather than just standing still like an idiot. So I slide into the seat at the bar and wait for him to talk, straining my ears at the same time to try and hear more detailed information as to what is going on in the corner in the 'man-to-man' talk.

"Michael is asking Sam as to whether or not he means more to him than Amelie… and that was a silly question," Oliver comments and I can tell that he is enjoying himself at relaying this information. "Sam is, of course, hesitant to answer and now… well, you can see for yourself."

Michael stands up and strides away from Sam, leaving the flame haired man looking heartbroken with his mouth still open – evidently he was going to reply but Michael didn't give him enough time. So now my boyfriend – it still seems weird to call him that – is striding back into Oliver's office and evidently ready to use the portal home.

"Um, I gotta go – thanks for the mocha, Oliver," I say as I stand up and race (human speed, of course) towards the back office. The grumpy hippie rolls his eyes and nods to nobody in particular but I know that it is to me, so I head into the office and look for Michael.

But he isn't here.

He must have already left, or something. So I walk through the portal and into the Glass House… but there is no fresh scent of him here either. Nonetheless, my senses aren't very good – courtesy of being a vampire for a week – so I call, "Michael? You home?"

Not surprisingly, there isn't a response… so just where could he be?

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**Nice question here for you – where is he?**

**Your thoughts are, as always, much appreciated and I haven't written the next chapter yet so I **_**could**_** incorporate your idea in!**

**Review!**

**Vicky xx**


	19. Final Greetings And Sortings Out

**Chapter 19:**

**Only 2 reviews, but this is the final chapter, so have it on me.**

**Thanks to all the reviews, favs, alerts and the Author ones as well stemming from this story!**

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_Michael's POV:_

I cannot believe that she did that… no, actually, I can. This is Claire: she always tries to do the best thing for people; she always tries to sort out arguments and stuff. But this is just one place she _cannot_ sort out – nobody can. I have wanted to for ages and he has as well, but we end up just arguing… or I end up asking him a stupid question. Like this time; everything was going just great and then I _had_ to ask him if he loved me or Amelie more. It's as if I _want_ to not have a relationship with the only relative I have in Morganville.

For some strange reason, as I walk through the portal, I emerge in Amelie's office and she looks up, confused and surprised. I suppose she thinks I am Sam for a second, not noticing the hair, and something about her expression makes me want to gag: it's like how a kid must feel about seeing their parent falling in love with someone other than their parent – makes them want to throw up. Sam's been like a Dad to me, especially for a short time between when my parents left and when we had the argument before I turned into a ghost.

"Michael, what on _earth _are you doing here?" Amelie asks me sharply, standing up to greet me, almost. Yet she doesn't even come up to my shoulders, which only makes it seem pitiful… or it _would_, if I didn't know that the petite woman in front of me could destroy me with one finger, probably.

I shut the portal behind me – it's still strange to me, to be able to use a portal – and shake my head, wondering why I am here. Then it hits me: Sam's answer to my question is the reason I am here, it's the _only_ reason why I could be here. "I need to ask you something serious," I say slowly, moving closer to the desk.

Her eyebrow arches slightly but she motions for me to take a seat, she sitting down in her own chair once again. Here, her fingers press together and her eyes pierce my own, trying to ascertain why I am here. "What do you _want_, Michael?" she asks me tiredly, something about her seeming not entirely happy to see me.

"Do you love my Grandad?" I ask her bluntly, not caring about giving a spiel the way that _she_ would have done if she were asking the questions. I get the reaction I thought I would: she leans back in shock and evidently seems as if she doesn't know how to answer – does she do so truthfully or continue the charade that she has had for half a century, barely lapsing when Claire was unconscious?

"What is the relevance of this question?" unsurprisingly, Amelie answers my question with another question in her attempts to evade answering.

"The relevance of this question is that when I asked my Grandfather if he loved me or you more, he couldn't answer," I snap at her, not caring about my tone. Normally, she would have bitten my head off (likely literally) for talking like this to her, but I suppose my response caught her off guard enough to stop her retaliating. She doesn't answer for a second, her expression entirely relaxed from her usual 'I will show no emotion because I want the world to think I am a robot' expression, to simply shock and love… it shows me that, no matter what she has ever said, she loves him. he isn't suffering from unreciprocated love: if he had been unable to answer me and she _hadn't_ loved him back, I would be pissed right now.

Now, I just don't know _how_ to continue.

Finally, she responds. "I can truly tell you now, Michael, that there hasn't been a day that has gone by that I have not loved your Grandfather – since I met him, that is. I cannot… I cannot ask him to answer either way, for the loves are entirely different, and I hope that you do not judge him for not answering, Michael, because… oh, I don't know how to say it," she trails off, a tear actually in her eye. This is the proof I have that she _does_ love him… but how do _I_ take this? Do I do as she was alluding to: that the loves are entirely different and asking him to compare the love he has for me and the love he has for Amelie is wrong?

I sit in silence, not knowing what to say, and she does the same, evidently not wanting to push me or… oh, I don't bloody know.

"Thanks," I mutter suddenly, standing up and moving to the portal. "See you around, Amelie," I give my departing 'message' thing and walk through the portal before she can respond, something which I'm not entirely sure was a good idea or not… but it's too late because I'm gone and wondering what to do now.

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_Claire's POV:_

Where the hell could he be? He isn't _anywhere_ in this house, his phone is in here somewhere as I can hear it ringing, and I doubt he's gone through the portal to Myrnin's or something to then return to Common Grounds.

But Common Grounds is the last place that I haven't checked yet… it's the one place that Michael could go to that I haven't been yet – and I've been looking for over half an hour. As a stretch, I even went to Sam's apartment to see if he had gone there but he hadn't…

I walk through the portal back into Common Grounds and find Oliver in his office. "My, my, I think I'm going crazy: you _and_ the Glass boy returning in the same day!" he says; well, that's just confirmed that Michael is here. But why? Is he looking for me or has he come back for Sam, to discuss the reason why he ran off… if Sam is still here?

"Is Michael still here then?" I try to make my tone seem as if I'm not bothered but, of course, Oliver sees through it. He raises an eyebrow in an _extremely_ Amelie-esque way, before then attacking my statement.

"Something wrong in lover's corner?" he retorts, an evil grin on his face. Trust Oliver to only ever grin if something is up with people. "I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that you're already finding that there are problems in the road… more so than just with the Collins boy."

The mention of Shane drives me to move forwards and slam a pencil point down into his desk. "Dare to mention his name again and I will stab you through the heart with a stake so hard that you die, understand?" I hiss, for the first time since I was turned feeling as if I'm a vampire. I feel as if I'm losing control, as if I can feel the raw power beneath my skin as though I could attack him: even though he is older than me and could destroy me, the strength is in me and I feel as if I'm able to decimate him.

"Why, little Claire has managed to grow a backbone," he comments lightly, before actually getting to telling me what I want. "Yes, he is still here. But you may not want to interrupt him because your little arrangement between him and Sam has restarted now… go have a coffee," he explains: _yes_! He has actually listened to me and come back to talk to Sam, which is what I wanted!

"See you later, little Ollypop!" I laugh, stepping out of the office quickly so that he can't murder me for calling him Ollypop… I may have called him it earlier but we were in the café so he couldn't exactly kill me, could he?

I rush out of the office and stop dead in the café, spotting Sam and Michael sitting _and actually talking_ in the corner of the room. Michael doesn't look as if he's about to run off, like he did earlier, but actually as if he wants to talk to Sam.

Then my gaze stops on someone else. Someone standing just in front of me, right by the counter. Shane… he's here, and he is looking right at me.

"Hey," he says awkwardly, not sure what to say. I'm the same: after the time I kissed him only a week or so ago, I don't know how to address him, or what topics to broach. "You ok?" he takes the first step, asking how I am.

"I'm… good," I decide after a short pause, wondering what to answer to a rather hard question when it's coming from your ex-lover who cheated on you. "You?"

He nods, smiling slightly. "I'm good… Claire, I just wanted to say I'm sorry for everything and that I shouldn't…" he begins to apologise but I don't want to hear anything about it.

"I forgive you," I butt in, deciding not to let him continue and he smiles, evidently happy about not having to continue. "Look, I hope that you have a good life and that when we run into each other, we can be friendly," I continue, knowing that we are _bound_ to bump into each other in Morganville and not wanting things to be _really_ weird between us.

He smiles slightly and nods, looking me in the eyes. "Yeah, I'd like that as well… look, I need to go to work but see you sometime?" he says, beginning to move away.

"Yeah, see you," I respond, waving as he leaves, before refocusing back on Michael and Sam. Almost as if he realises I'm watching him, Michael's head turns and notices me in the corner. He motions for me to come over, which I do at a human speed, and both him and Sam smile at me.

"Hey, Claire," Sam says as Michael pulls a chair out for me. "I just want to say thanks for this," he murmurs as Michael pretends not to listen, I think. His lips brush against my cheek (Michael's that is) and I smile, nodding at Sam.

"It's nothing, really," I protest but Michael shakes his head (what is _with_ all this nodding and shaking of heads?) at me and smiles.

"Thanks to you, something that should have been sorted years ago finally has," Michael contradicts me, causing me to smile. "And now, we're going to go and wrestle with Amelie until she confesses she loves Sam, right?" he looks over at Sam who nods and smiles.

"Yes, though I think the wording insinuates something slightly more violent than what we are _actually_ going to do," he laughs, standing up and waiting for us to do the same. "As you used the other method of getting here, you can come in my car if you want to Amelie's? yes, I am the only one who knows how to get there besides for herself and her guards…" he trails off, looking at our agog expressions that he knows where Amelie lives… and by that, we don't mean using the portal.

We head out of the café, me suddenly worried because I can't go in the sunlight _at all_ because I'd end up going redder than a lobster in less than a second. But it's ok because Sam has parked in the closest spot to the café which is entirely in the shade, meaning we, as the three youngest vampires, are just fine.

Michael and I slide into the back and he instantly wraps his arm around my waist, letting me fall into him. "Now, I don't want any funny business in my car, ok?" Sam says, mock severely and causes us both to laugh our heads off.

"Sure thing, Gramps," Michael says before pressing his lips to mine. I kiss him back and lose sight of everything on this earth, not even realising that we've been moving until Sam clears his throat _extremely_ loudly.

"We're here… something that I don't think you've realised since you're a little absorbed!" he yells the last part, causing me to jump across to the other side of the backseat, clutching my ears: he did _not_ need to yell.

"You just succeeded in deafening me, Sam, congratulations," I say bitterly, looking out of the window in interest. I was expecting that we would have to get through reams of guards and security but… we've just driven up into a driveway and parked in the shade (of course; nothing but practical vampires around here) and that is all.

"No problemo, Claire, not at all," he laughs again, getting out of the car. Michael has disappeared but suddenly reappears, opening the door for me. I get out with a smile and we all walk up to the front door together, Sam slightly in front, and I expect Sam to knock and wait but he simply strides straight into the house, as if he owns it.

"Sam!" I say, horrified. "You _can't_ do this… seriously, its breaking and entering… but with _Amelie_!" I continue, but he blows me off, waving his hand behind him as if it's _nothing_ what we're doing.

"I think we can do this, when we're going in to discuss what we are," he calls over his shoulder, running up the stairs. With an exchanged look with Michael, we set off after him, emerging in a corridor which is _entirely_ unfamiliar to me: but we follow his scent into a room which I _do_ recognise – it's Amelie's office.

"Sam, what are you _doing_ here?" I hear Amelie asking in shock, wondering why the hell he is there – just she wouldn't use those words, would she? Michael and I slow to a walk and take hands before emerging on a scene where basically Sam confesses his love and waits for Amelie to do the same.

"Amelie, I love you and I want you to either tell me that you love me now, or I walk away and never bother you again," he takes a huge risk in basically telling her she either reciprocates her love openly (come on, we _all_ know she loves him) or he will leave her alone.

She hesitates and locks eyes with _Michael_ for some reason, before answering. "Today, I was greeted with a dilemma: should someone love family or a spouse more?" she begins, evidently going to launch into one of her nice, if not slightly irrelevant, stories that piss most people off. "That person made me realise that if something is there, I shouldn't hide it… I love you, Samuel, but to show that… I don't know how to say it."

Something about the way she is looking at him and the way he is reciprocating that look, suggests to me that we should leave. So, with a pointed look at Michael and an incoherent mumbling about leaving, Michael and I race out of the office and down the stairs, where I decide that I can make a portal to take us home.

Swiftly, I do so and we emerge in our Glass House, the home which is _ours_ now and nobody else's. it seems so strange to think mere _weeks_ ago, I thought I was happy with Shane and Michael with Eve… I guess pairings change and that couples can end up making entire U-turns.

Shane and I have sorted things out and I hope that Eve and I can do the same… it may be a stretch for Shane and Michael, since they were already on rocky ground, but I would like to hope that they would both try, if only for the past they shared.

"Come here, honey," I whisper, wrapping my arms around Michael's back and continuing the kiss from in the car. Somewhere in Morganville, Sam and Amelie are patching things up; somewhere, Shane and Eve are working in their respective workplaces; somewhere, someone is low and needs helping up from a dark place. It's part of life…

I just hope that they have someone like Michael to help them up.

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**~cop out, I know. Sorry about the ending, it just worked that way and anything else I added (and I tried various things) seemed cheesy~**

**So, what did you guys think?**

**Please review!**

**As I said before, there shall **_**not**_** be a sequel, but I've many different stories for ALL pairings, pretty much… even *shudders* die hard ShanexClaire fans have something to read.**

**I want to thank everyone who has read this story over the past three/four months (I can't remember) and I hope people in the future read this story and enjoy it!**

**Ending off one of my longest A/N's in this story, thanks and REVIEW! Lol!**

**Vicky xx**


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